The Tides
by YukagiTamiya
Summary: Tomoya Okazaki and his daughter Ushio had been moving on together without Nagisa all these years, but are they clear of the shadows of the past?
1. Deep Eyes

CLANNAD visual novel is the property of Key. CLANNAD anime is produced by Kyoto Animation, and CLANNAD the Movie by Toei. This work of fiction is not for profit.

This work is based largely on the animated series, and is presented as a sequel to _After Story._ It presents a scenario where Nagisa had died from childbirth, but where Ushio had survived her ordeal in the snow, unlike in the series where she passed away as well. (Personally, I think that had been overkill.)

Feel free to rate and review.

The Tides, Chapter One

* * *

><p><em>Ah…,<em> thought Tomoya, _it looks like we'll finally have some fair weather tomorrow,_ as he gazed at the late afternoon sky. It really looked normal now. The sunset glow was just as to be expected for five in the afternoon, quite unlike the alternation of heavy gray pall and unsettling red smears on the heavens this past week.

Better yet, it was a Friday, and he could look forward to being with Ushio full time over the weekend.

Only that…

Work is not really over yet.

* * *

><p>'Home run!"<p>

No, Akio-san, it's not a home run.

A new kid who was an excellent jumper caught the ball eight feet in the air just as he left the hot corner.

When he touched home plate Akio belched out his most insultingly hearty laughter at the neighborhood boys. "Eh, you have a tad lot of rice to eat before you can even half beat that!' But the kids were just staring at him like his pants just fell. "Hah—what's with that spaced-out look of yours? Can't accept defeat with grace? Ah…if you get resentful over someone who beat you squarely in sports, you'll never advance in life!" Loud guffaw. "Take my advice, and learn from the one who had his years."

Tomoya had just turned on the lights of Furukawa Bread and was wiping the counter when he heard a horrendous shout from outside across the street. No doubt, it was "the old man". Making a goofball out of himself again. Really, he should be getting over his bad habits now. Still, he did not feel comfortable thinking of him as "old man", not anymore, since long ago when circumstances pushed them closer together: him, his in-laws, and his daughter. Since then he had also regarded him with more of the respect due a father-in-law, though some resentments still bubble at times. Like today.

"Tomoya-kun," Sanae said, "I hope you don't take it against Akio if he left the bakery with you for a while."

"No," he replied uneasily, "it's alright, he comes home in the evening, anyway." He looked in the direction of the park. "I'm sure he will coming back by now."

"I knew we could always rely on you," she said gratefully. "You were always such a good boy. After all, to whom else would we pass on this place after we're gone?"

Tomoya laughed. "Such nonsense, Sanae-san. You don't look it. You always look your best, even at that age a highschooler might still want to date you. Better watch out."

Sanae let out such a beautiful laugh it unnerved him. She sounded clearly flattered. "Oh, Tomoya-kun, always funny as ever."

"You flirting with Sanae again?" threatened Akio to a startled Tomoya.

"'Again'? We were just discussing what will happen to the bakery when you're gone, Akio-san, and now this?"

"So you want me dead so you can take Sanae all for yourself?' he blared.

"Akio-san," Sanae said, "stop troubling him with crude black jokes like that."

"Phew! I should have known all along. Really, Tomoya I do not know what you feed all those girls back in the day, but it will take more than flattery to get Sanae." He made a heroic pose. "You must step over my dead body!"

"Actually, Akio," chimed Sanae, "if only you were half as good in compliments as he is, you can flirt me all you want."

"But of course, Sanae!" he gushed, taking her hands. "I've never seen a galactic beauty as you are! You have the looks to destroy the universe, just like your bread. AHAHAHA….Haha …Ha…Huh?…"

Uh-oh.

"So my bread…" sobbing, "… my bread… destroys the universe!"

The heartbroken lady ran out in a weeping fit, and now Akio had to stuff a number of her oyster-flavored rosemary muffins (whatever that was) into his mouth and dash after her. "Oyster bread is the hope of the cosmos!" Tomoya followed them outside and saw them off.

He was still gazing after them when someone called him. "Sir?"

He turned to see two boy seniors from Hikarizaka escorting another senior, a girl, of long, flowing, brownish hair, and browner eyes.

It's not about the color, though. The least that could be said of those eyes is that they're…deep.

His daughter.

"Papa…" she mumbled nervously, seeing that not-so-pleasant look of his. "I'm sorry. You're not home, and… I was really worried I'd be late 'cause I went all the way here to look for you."

He did not say anything. Before long she made out that the black looks were aimed at her companions.

"W-We took Ushio-chan to the clinic today and she had to rest there for quite some time. We were worried about her all the way so we made sure we'll be there if she needs help." They bowed low. "Please accept our apologies."

"Your mothers might be looking for you by now," he spat out. "Be good boys and go straight home."

"Papa…" she whispered with concern.

"Worrying about other people's girls is not your responsibility."

"We're very sorry, sir!" As they hastily left they wanted to bid her goodbye but all they could do was look back before they finally disappeared in the evening shadows.

The girl looked hurt. _Papa,_ she thought, _those guys were only helping me. What kind of treatment is that?_ "Papa…"

Tomoya followed the boys with his glares. Upon seeing her expression, however, he instantly softened. He took her in his arms and kissed her on the forehead. "Come now, Ushio, don't give me that." He then felt her neck, forehead, and back. He couldn't remember her not feeling well when she left their apartment that morning. "What happened to you, dear?"

"No, dad, it's nothing. I…it was hot."

Well, he thought, it really was getting hot that morning. He was sweating in Yusuke's van, not to mention being in that stuffy lineman suit atop a pole exposed to the elements all day long.

"Well, then, you can sleep here with me for the night. I must be manning the bakery this weekend so I guess we can't eat out for now. Sorry."

To his surprise, she lightened up. "Really? We're staying here?" She let out her version of Sanae's laugh. "Then why don't we eat in? You know how much I love Sanae-san cook. Her bread's just great!"

"I'm so glad to hear that, Ushio-chan!" sniffled Sanae as they sat down to dinner. "You are a great comfort to my dark and sorrowful life."

_Not to mention how sorrowful too the people who had a taste of the rainbow bread,_ thought Tomoya.

"Don't worry, Sanae-san, I'll be here with dad the whole weekend, and I'll even help you invent new flavors for the bread."

_Oh no, Ushio, not you, too._

"You know, Sanae-san, I just found this wonderful book on pastries and confectioneries. Come to think, Sanae-san, I don't suppose you have ever made any pies yet."

"I would love to, Shio-chan! And since you're here as well, we'll be having a great time."

She drew close to her sister-looking grandmother and leaned on her bosom. "You bet, Sanae-san." Ushio has taken a special liking to Sanae, being the closest link she could have to the one missing in her life. Heck, she is to her the closest person that looks like her beloved mother. And they do often bake together. Which was for the better, as the girl can be on hand to put some sense into Sanae's baking.

"By the way, Ushio," said Akio, "Perhaps you might want us to get a new uniform for you. You're growing fast and it looks like your present uniform can't hold you in."

She blushed. "My friends say that, too." Then, hopefully, straightening up, "Akio-san, you don't think I'm gaining weight, do you?"

"Eh, why should a girl of your figure worry about weight? If you add weight it would be from muscle, not fat. You don't look like someone predisposed to fat. Neither that it runs in our family."

"I don't want to be muscular, either. I want to stay slim and tall, and my complexion smooth, just like the others do."

"Eheh. That's my girl! Ready to smite a man as well as her mother did, eh, Tomoya?"

"Blah," scoffed Tomoya at his daughter. "I should say smitten. Don't tell me you're actually preening for someone at school."

She was taken aback. "Dad!"

"You're getting pretty vain. Just because you're in high school."

Everybody else at the table could not speak.

It stayed this way for perhaps at least a full minute before Sanae could finally speak up, if distantly.

"I must say, our little girl is our little girl. And she's not little anymore." She managed a weak smile.

"Well," said Akio, "I think I should see the tea. You go on, I'll be back."

* * *

><p>At about eleven Ushio had already been in bed but Tomoya was still downstairs musing. Some of it was about the uproar he caused at dinner, but he was pretty firm in that and would not let himself mind it a lot. Mystifying, though, was how the girl told him she went to the clinic because of heat. She was one to be especially vulnerable to <em>cold<em>, indeed there had been a particularly unhappy experience about that when she was smaller, but she couldn't possibly weaken too easily to heat, maybe? She could just drink something, like he often does. Perhaps it was the change in the weather?

Still unconvinced, he went up quietly to Ushio's room to check if she is alright.

Well, whoa, she's up.

"Papa?"

"Ushio," he said softly.

He went over to her side, sat on her bed, and cradled the back of her head in his left hand with an endearing rub, the same way he did to her mother years before. She can feel through her hair the ring he wore there.

He then held her hands. "You should be resting now, Ushio," he said.

She gently gestured a 'no'.

She looked at her father's face and saw in it a handsome man, the dashingly careless hero her grade school teacher Fujibayashi-sensei always ranted about to her. At the same time, looking carefully, and she was more than able when it comes to subtle observations, she can discern a man who was really, really, really tired.

Glancing down, she saw his hands—and the left one. As soon as she laid sight on it, her eyes widened, and moistened. She shut them and turned her face away from him.

"What's wrong, Ushio?"

"Papa," she began, "can you… can you trust your daughter?"

When, stunned, he could barely manage a reply, she continued. "Can you trust your daughter…not to hurt you? Ever again?"

She then stared at him through those enthralling brown discs, which, intriguing at first glance, transfigures into breathtaking pools of vastness whenever a very sensitive chord in her is struck.

Tomoya reflected to her his own expression: awe, joy for discovering such unearthly beauty, and the bewilderment of hardly accepting that such a sight could be possible. It turned out that this was only the third time he saw her like this in the entire seventeen years of her frail, borrowed time on earth.

"Papa. You were not always like this."

She suddenly gripped him in a stranglehold embrace. She pressed her cheek against her father's. She merged her tears with his, flowing in rivulets. She struggled to hold him in, with all the young-love passion she could never show to any other man. Not while he was here.

Later, they have both calmed down, only a bit, resting in each other arms, but they would not let go of what they had wanted to say.

"I always thought you were happy," she sobbed. "When I was little every time you talked to Kyou-sensei, to Yusuke and Kouko-san, to Fuko, to Sanae and Akki, you were strong, unmoved. After I got out from the hospital that winter, I didn't know what happened to you. You never told me.

"Why, papa? Have I become another person after I recovered? Or perhaps I have done something to you again? I don't even know if you really trust me."

"Stop saying absurdities," he choked. "You're only clouded." He wiped his face with one arm. "I will always trust you." And he wiped hers. "But I will trust you even more…if you tell me what really happened to you yesterday."

She was somewhat shocked. "Papa…"

"Ushio, tell me. Tell me."

"Papa, please…"

"Ushio, you asked me if I trust you, but you must also let me know that you trust me as well."

A look of pity for him surfaced on her. "Papa…"

"IDIOTS! BASTARDS!"

Ushio was clinging to Tomoya as he stormed across Hikarizaka High's soccer field where he knew the rugby club also practiced every Saturday. He was too fuming mad to hold down. Akio and Sanae had earlier tried to talk him down as well, but he was just intractable. Akio told him not to make a ruckus without even knowing who exactly pulled the prank on Ushio (one of the rather few times he looked wiser than his son-in-law), but he could not forget the low but sizable bump on the top of her head, obviously from being hit by the wide bottom of a wash pan. From a huge, piñata-like papier-mâché ball.

_Pull me. It'll be fun._

"Let go! I swear I'll kill whoever did this!"

"Dad, don't get worked up! Your blood pressure—"

"To hell with what Ryou says! Where was she even when this happened? And why didn't Kyou know about this? Those rugby dogs need a kick or two from her.'

"It's only yesterday, Dad! And you know how busy they are."

Ushio was practically dragging along until Tomoya grabbed one of the players' neck, a rather burly fellow, with his arms, Ushio locking both of hers around her father's waist. "Let go…punk…"

It looked like they were playing an overly perverted children's game.

"All of you!" bellowed Tomoya, "If you don't vomit who whacked up my girl, none of you will live to see the next day!"

"H-Hey," they fearfully faltered, "Why are you looking at us all of sudden? Just because we pick fights—"

"It's _because_ you pick fights! Nothing good could ever come from you. I know women who'll beat the guts out of you, just so you know how it is to pick on a lady!"

One of them was starting to get nervous. "He's not talking about Misae-san, is he?"

Another called out to Tomoya. "Misae moved out last month! If I were you, I wouldn't let women do the fighting for me."

Another murmur came up. "I heard there were really bad gals studied here and kicked gangster butts years ago, but they all graduated now."

"Let's just take him out! There's no other girl or guy here but us."

The team started to surround Tomoya. "Get him!"

"Everyone!" rang a calm, clear voice.

"Eh?" they said, rugby, Tomoya, and Ushio, in unison. So there _was _someone else at school on a Saturday, after all. And female, too.

A teacher?

She does look very smart in her outfit, but rather too smart for a high school sensei. It took them a moment to realize that this was someone else. The rugby team saw her as

"The guest lecturer from America." "One of the new honorary fellows of the school board." "Toured every top university in nearly all of Japan, including Keno." "Heck, I even heard she is presently _based _in Keno, if she's not abroad."

Ushio saw her as

_What a fine lady. She definitely does not belong here in Hikarizaka._

And Tomoya

"Kotomi", he gasped.

"All of you are a shame to this school, and this city," the lady said. "At an age when human knowledge had advanced people should learn how to deal with their differences professionally. If you don't behave yourselves I'll see to it the board hears of this."

All the rugby boys fell in line and bowed low to this unlikely creature. Even the big one managed to wriggle out of the dazed Tomoya's grasp and join his fellows. "We understand ma'am. Accept our apologies, Miss Ichinose-sama."

"It's _Doctor_ Ichinose for you. You spell Ichinose with three kanji. And never mind the –sama. I'm not putting myself above you, I only want all of us to act like civilized men. Now tell me what this is about."

"This bum—er—fellow here is accusing us of harming his daughter.'

"Pulling pranks!" retorted Tomoya.

"Enough!" she said. "I don't want an argument. Now," she commanded the team, "investigate on all the possible identities who could have done this to his daughter, and submit a report to the student council within thirty-six hours."

The big one counted off on his fingers. "But Miss—er—professor—er—doctor—er—master—ah…ah… We don't have until Sunday night! The student council opens with classes on Monday!"

"You don't have the president's e-mail?" she flashed.

"Okay! You got it." To the rest, "Let's go!" They went out in file, jogging and chanting like troopers.

After they have disappeared from view, Kotomi glanced back at Tomoya. "Tomoya-kun," she said, bowing, "Konnichiwa. I'm sorry about that. It is necessary when facing people who get physical.'

"It's nothing," he said, laughing uneasily. "It's not like I'm not myself inclined. You know me ever since."

She came closer and regarded him intimately. "Yes. We know each other. Ever since." When she saw Ushio, "And she is your child?"

Suddenly she had a flashback. This was the one she never actually saw, only felt, in her mother's womb. She could remember vividly what she said back then. "It's wonderful."

She reached out as if to rub Nagisa's pregnant belly, but instead caressed Ushio's face, down to the nape, fingering through her hair.

"So… beautiful."

Ushio blushed. "How can you say that, Dr. Ichinose, when it's you who are exceptionally lovely?"

"Tomoya," she rhapsodized, though face and body clearly conversed with Ushio, "I remember that time. We, the twins, Sunohara, and I, all of us, we were there when Nagisa had her child. Even then I could feel the baby's heartbeat under my fingertips. Even inside, I knew she was fine as gossamer, delicate, just like her fragile mother."

She took the girl into her embrace and rested her head against her neck. "So you are Ushio. What a noble creation you have grown to be. If only I could be your mother…"

Father and child were dumbfounded.

When Kotomi sensed that they did not react, and saw their expressions, she promptly came to. "I…I didn't mean anything. Sorry." She paused to pick out a stray tear with her finger. "It's just that you always have Tomoyo, Kyou, Ryou, and Sunohara, while I never even got to see your daughter grow."

"Ah…we really don't see each other every day. They got their work, too."

"Still, it's different if your friends are close at hand." She smiled. "I really should count myself blessed to have stumbled into you today,"

"By the way, why are you here? And on a weekend?"

"The director invited me for a student exchange program. I'd rather not make waves than if I came on a school day."

"Well," shrugged Tomoya, "now the rugby boys will storm it out for you."

"Never mind, I won't have to suffer through that as I need to stay here only today."

"You already going back to the States?"

"I must return to Tokyo first and stay before my flight on Tuesday."

"Well, wouldn't you at least drop by for the night? Akio and Sanae-san would be delighted to have someone from Keno, and I'm sure my girl here would want to hear a lot from you."

"Do you perhaps…still live where we found you before?"

"Ah, yes, the apartment's still there. But we're staying at Furukawa Bakers for the weekend."

"Then wait for me there. As for Ushio, well, I do have much to share. If Hikarizaka has nobody to recommend already, she just might qualify for the exchange program."

They were stunned. "Ichinose-san, you're only too kind," they fumbled with a bow.

She laughed. "Don't be silly, you two. It's the most I could do after these years of absence. And I did say there might be others didn't I?"

She gave Ushio a special contact card with her private e-mail and Academia and Twitter accounts. "I would have given you the website as well, but it's too public."

With that, she parted with a kiss to Ushio, and crossed the field.

The two could only stare after her. Tomoya was even more struck.

"Did Kotomi…just…laugh?"


	2. Once More at the Foot of the Hill

Evening found the Furukawa couple all agog over the kitchen. At one point there was so much steam it fogged out Tomoya at the counter. It didn't help that Ushio was assisting them instead of helping him fan the vapor out. Must keep this up before any customer notices.

After about a half-hour and aching arms, he closed the door and slumped down. And just as he did—

Door chime!

He jumped up, doffed his apron, towel-rubbed the grime out of his face till it hurt, and combed. He felt if his beard has grown. Nope, he just shaved. OK, presentable enough. "Konnbanwa! Welcome, Koto—"

"Oh how sweet of you!" cried Kyou. "I never knew you would doll up for me like that—since you never did—and at such a romantic hour!"

"Oh…" he mumbled. "Hi…"

She arched an eyebrow. "Is that how you follow up a gentlemanly getup? Shouldn't it be something like, 'Anything for a lovely maiden like you.'? "

"Really, I was expecting someone else."

"Oh?" she said, intrigued. "Kouko-san? Hmmm… You might have to watch out for Fuko again."

"Nah. Saturday evenings are meant for family dinners over there."

"Is that so?" She caught the aroma from the kitchen. "Mmmm. That leaves _me_ for dine-in visitor status."

"Kyou-sensei!" said a voice from behind.

"Ushio!"

The two hugged. The teacher disheveled her hair in a friendly top-of-the-head rub. "Still pretty as ever! Looks like you'd get a beau sooner than this old lady."

_Not funny, old maid,_ thought Tomoya.

Still rubbing, "When I come to town I'll pick you up after school and we'll get you a swimsuit; wouldn't that be dandy—huh? What happened to your scalp?"

When Tomoya related to her the misfortune that befell the girl, she switched her terminator eyes on. "Why did you let that happen!" she ranted, shaking her by the shoulders. "Tell me who did it to you! Is he a senior? A junior? Even if he's a freshman I'll make sure he'll get a word from me!"

" 'Words' you should say", cut in Tomoya, referring to the lexicon she uses as a shot-put back in the day.

Door chime again. Two girl classmates of Ushio came in.

"KONNBANWA!" yelled Furusato Chii. "Whoa, looks like we got a party here. Good evening, Mr. Okazaki."

"Good evening, sir," bowed Ueno Akemi. "Have they found who pranked Ushio already?"

"Not yet," said Tomoya, "but an investigation is already under way."

"You know, girl," the blonde Chii clattered to Ushio, repeatedly slapping the back of her shoulder in her sporty way, "we could beat the daylights out of them as soon as we find out! It will be fun. Nobody'd lift a finger at us anymore."

Just then, "Ho…" interrupted Akio as he emerged from the kitchen, "looks like our feast isn't about to go to waste now.'

"Give me five, old guy!" waved Chii, but Ushio chided her rudeness. "Sorry…"

"Good evening, Akio-san," said Akemi. "That smells good. Looks like you're expecting visitors."

"Actually just one, but hey—there's no better time to show off my culinary skills. I'm just about good at every type of food, not just bread, quite unlike someone I know—" Tomoya had just gagged him with a hand, narrowly averting disaster.

"By the way, guys," he chuckled, "since you're already here, it might not hurt if you have a taste."

"Indeed? Ha! You bet, Tomoya!" said Kyou with a thumbs-up.

Door chime. Everybody turned to see

"Konnbanwa, everyone," waved Yoshino Kouko. Behind her is her husband Yusuke with their five-year-old boy Shinta in tow. "We just ran out of rolls and Yusuke here would have none of his dinner without it."

"Furukawa cheese-topped pastry rolls are a classic," said Yusuke with that signature cool-guy pose of his. "Everybody loves them."

Shinta was looking around. But as soon as he recognized Ushio, he flung himself at her skirt and tugged. "Piggyback!"

"W-What?" stammered the girl. "Wait, I-I'm not done with the manju yet."

"Piggyback!"

"Shinta," chided Kouko, "leave her alone. They must be having guests."

"Actually," said Tomoya, "you yourselves can be our guests tonight, as well, as we have an illustrious woman coming to our humble abode."

Everybody was thunderstruck… Except "Piggyback!"

"It's best if you hang around and await her presence. Hey, wouldn't you know, it's only now that I realize I can have a double surprise, for you and for her. This would be a welcome party."

"Piggyback!"

"Ooh." Hummed Chii. "Probably another celebrity like Yoshino-san."

"Nope. A Keno professor."

More oohs and ahhs.

"Pig-gy-back!"

"Hmmm," said Kyou. "If it's someone we know, that should sound like…"

"Mama, I want piggyback with Ushi. I don't see her at school anymore."

Ushio sighed. "It's OK, Kouko-san." She took him up and set him on her shoulders. "Oof. Man, he has grown. Don't think I was this heavy at his age."

Shinta started to pull at her hair as with the reins of a horse. "I bigger! I Ultra! Yaa!"

"Shinta…Ow…"

"Hey!" said Chii, "You just turned her into a coin-op ride." Big tongue from Shinta.

Door chime.

Now…

This time, everybody, wide-eyed, turned hesitatingly to look toward the door.

It must be…

_Could I possibly be right?_ thought Kyou. _It's been ages since she came here. Nagisa was still alive when she last showed up. It must be her._

"Fuko…has arrived!"

"Fu-chan!" cried Kouko. "I told you to wait for us at home."

"Fuko was bored so Fuko smelled you all the way here." Sniff…Sniff… "Dinner's ready! Fuko's excited!"

Just then, she saw Ushio, and…well…you know what's next.

_Blag!_

"Fu-chan, you haven't even asked permission," cried Kouko as her little (physically, too) sister clung with squint eyes to the shocked girl.

"Mama," cried Shinta, "monster got my horsey! Shoo! Shoo!"

But Fuko would have none of it all, and in a moment she lapsed into starfish euphoria.

"Oh…" sighed Kouko, "what am I to do with her?"

"I hope we're not causing too much trouble, now," said Yusuke.

"Shoo! Shoo!"

"It's alright," said Tomoya. "I'll get her." He simply put his open hand on the dazed girl's head, which immediately triggered a knee-jerk horror on her that sent her jumping back. It seemed she had a terrible allergy from contact with Tomoya.

"Fuko is attacked! Fuko strikes back!" She took one of her starfish hairpins and threw it at Tomoya like a shuriken. He ducked, everybody ducked, save for Shinta who was having the time of his life. "Wee! Monster fight! Ya! Ya! Ultra beam!"

* * *

><p>Everything turned out well after all. It was such a party. Kyou and Ushio chattered and laughed about girl things, to Akemi's delight, and Chii took to talking sports with Akio, who she really admired. Come to think of it, a lot of people actually look up to the Furukawas just for making their day. And it's not really their providing "entertainment" for the neighborhood, but just recently Tomoya had discovered how many people Akio and Sanae helped in their own way, assisting in chores and the like and even giving bread (Akio's) to the sick or on birthdays. And the kids really do have fun playing with him, after all. For a moment he was oddly proud of him. Meanwhile the children (one a real child and another childish) had slept on full bellies, thankfully.<p>

The guest of honor, however, did not come.

Such an up mood from last night carried him through the next day.

He again found himself at five in the afternoon. This was one hour when he takes to musing and brooding.

He took some crumbs and sowed it on the ground for the sparrows. Somehow, it increased his relaxation. His in-laws and daughter were resting, but there were hardly any customers so he had the luxury of standing outside and drinking in the afternoon sky.

A light breeze blew in from the mountains and he felt a bit sleepy himself.

"Tomoya-kun."

"Eh?"

"How are you?" greeted Kotomi.

"Kotomi," he gasped. "We were waiting for you last night."

"I didn't say I was coming last night," she said somewhat shyly.

"I asked you to come last night, and you said yes. We made a banquet." He sighed. "Now there are only leftovers. I'm sorry."

She gestured a 'no'. "I didn't come for the food." She looked into the house. "Is Ushio here?"

"Asleep."

"Oh. Well, I…had hoped to see her today. And her grandparents, too." She looked at him in concern. "Do you think they still remember me?"

"Heck! Why wouldn't they? Everybody who had loved Nagisa will always be remembered in this house."

"Oh…" she faltered. She looked at the sparrows that played on the road. "The birds. They get loud sometimes, don't they?"

"Ah, yes," he chuckled. "You should expect them at this time of the day."

Kotomi smiled warmly and giggled under her breath along with him. "I guess, maybe I'll just meet up with them some time. Does no good to pressure them by waiting for them here."

"Hey, it's nothing. They should be excited to see you after these years. You owe us one after all for not showing up."

"You think so?" She gazed at the sharpening outlines of the skyscape. "There would be plenty of time, anyway. And please tell me I am grateful for their preparations, but please don't bother so much just for me next time."

"Kotomi," he said under his breath, "you're only too kind."

And aloud, "But you may not have another chance until who knows? You must be leaving for Tokyo tonight."

"Indeed. I'll be going now."

"Wait. At least I could escort you to the Shinkansen…"

She smiled even more warmly. "My car is parked over there. Go back, there's nobody at the bakery."

* * *

><p>Ushio recently have had that queer habit of getting up at unearthly hours of the night. And that's not all. She was, feverishly it seems, working on something.<p>

The crayon rapidly scudded over the canvas. In a short time it was done. She took another canvas and made another broad stroke.

This continued until about past three in the morning, when she returned to sleep.

* * *

><p>At lunch, Chii and Akemi went over to Ushio's seat for their meal together. It wasn't the usual lighthearted chat, though, for shortly after they have settled, the two classmates turned the session into a serious conclave.<p>

"How did you find Dr. Ichinose, Ushio?" ventured Chii.

"And you ask that all of a sudden?"

"Come on! You dismiss her just like she's an ordinary teacher. The rugby team and everybody else says she's from Keno, right? Man, you could get yourself into Keno if you pull the right strings."

"It does not happen to be that way," she replied, somewhat irritated. "We only just met."

"Ushio's got a point," chided Akemi. "She still got to prove herself if ever she gets into a university like that. Still, you got an open gate there."

"However," added Ushio, "just because a gate is open doesn't mean you walk in uninvited."

"Girl!" exclaimed Chii, "Your reasoning's far out! Don't you see all those students in cram school? There are _tons_ of people killing each other just to study in Tokyo. If I were you, I'd not just look for an open door, I'll hack a wall to make one! And you got one already in reach!"

"All the world's an opportunist," sighed Ushio.

"That's the way it is! Sheesh, when will you learn?"

As if on cue, a bevy of students, mostly male, had flocked to where they were sitting.

"Okazaki-san, do you know Dr. Ichinose?" "Maybe you could introduce me to her." "Please at least pass on my credentials. It'd go a long way."

"She just went back to the States."

"You can e-mail her, maybe. She must have given you her contacts."

_You got a powerful imagination there. How could you have possibly ferreted that out?_

"I tell you, I only met her once. If you want to get into the exchange program, ask the board."

All of them, Chii and Akemi included, were dumbstruck as if splashed with ice-cold water.

"So there was an exchange program, care of Dr. Ichinose!" said a junior excitedly, visibly tingling. "And you actually know that!"

"She got access to information from the board! Dr. Ichinose and you must be quite thick to be sharing things like that."

Ushio was also dumbstruck, but with regret. _What did I just say? _ "Ehehe… She just mentioned it in passing. Dad just asked what she was doing in school, and that's it."

"And your dad just asked what on earth she was doing in school, and she actually replied! If I were to say that to a teacher I'd probably get slapped."

"Thick…thick…thick…" they said, in formulaic chanting.

_Oh my! How did I get here? Papa, how did you ever run into her in the first place?_

"Hello, Tomoya-kun."

It's Ryou.

She must have been in the apartment for at least a half-hour. She had brought a meal she had especially made and packed herself. The old curtain by the window (Ushio of course usually did the place but was not very good with large fabrics) had been replaced by a cheerful, summery silks that brought much needed refreshment to the eyes after a hard day's work. Odd. How did Ryou get into the house?

"Ushio gave one of the keys. She said she would be home shortly, anyway."

"That girl. I told her not to give away such important stuff like that. But if it's only you, I guess she is excused."

Ryou giggled. "I have a day-off so I want to spend a while with you for a change."

"Your Onee-chan's getting unbearable?"

"Oh no…but I have had enough of her for a while. Oh yes, take this bento. You can put it in the microwave if you want to eat it tomorrow."

"No. I thought to drop by the grocer's for tonight's dinner, but I didn't, good thing."

She giggled. "You must have known I was coming."

"Hey," he said, a bit embarrassed, "If I really knew, I should be the one doing the meal, right?"

"I'm home!" announced Ushio. "Oh hi, Ryou-chan!"

"Hi, Ushio-chan. You're getting ever more genki by the minute."

_Ryou-chan?_ "You and Ryou girl friends?"

Ushio laughed. "Can't you see, Papa, how baby-faced she is? She deserves a –chan!"

"Oh no, Ushio," Ryou faltered. "Cut it out, will you?"

"But it's true! And you're such a wonderful homemaker."

"Ushio," interrupted an embarrassed Tomoya, to change the subject, showing her a suitcase, "I bought this for you from what we have saved. I know you'll be needing this."

"Wow!" She took the case and opened. Yup, it was just as she expected. The laptop. "Haha! Now I won't have to do with our old desktop."

"Our internet switches fairly easily to it, also."

"Congratulations, Ushio," said Ryou.

She raced to her room with her new plaything in spite of Tomoya urging her to dress first. Man, the girl can be impossible at times.

"It's really fun in the house with her, don't you think?"

"Fun…and not, too. Takes a lot to raise her, but it's worth its salt."

"I thought I should help out with her when I have the time. I got a leave next month for taking a short course in radiology, but the school is not very far and I can drop by every now and then, if you don't mind."

"What can I do? You got the key."

_Hmmm…,_ thought Tomoya, _Kyou's reviving her old dream of matching her twin with me. Funny, though, 'cause she never even hinted at such. Perhaps Ryou is picking up confidence on her own?_

Indeed, for much the rest of the week, he arrived home every day to find a bento at the apartment. _Ryou really is finding time to drop this off. Her hospital duties appear to be quite light these days._ His daughter takes most of it, but then she would quickly plunge herself afterwards into her room with the computer. _Was it a good thing to have bought it? Her studies might plummet._ Nah, she wasn't that kind of girl, but he must admit she got a terrible attachment to that thing.

Still, it would be interesting to see what exactly cleaves the girl to her toy.

" 'Facenook'?"

"Uncle Youhei said this site is hot outside Japan," Ushio clarified.

"You mean he's actually out of the country?" he mumbled, not really interested.

"Yes. He and Tomoyo-san are dating in the Philippines."

He was struck. "So he really _is _abroad!" He shoved himself into Ushio's side. "No wonder the two didn't show up for a whole month. Let me see!"

A flood of photos confirmed their whereabouts. Visions of a tropical paradise danced before him as he clicked on pic after pic, while the couple got tanner and tanner, and Sunohara growing a prickly mustache. Heck, even his hair seemed to turn white from so much dipping in the sea. There were also a lot of photos of that old mischief of his, and being smacked by his fiancé for that.

And don't forget Kotomi's card. Ushio had her eyes opened by the discussions the good doctor had at her Academia, and there was a hot exchange over the e-mail and some of the Twitter. Subjects range from Oriental cuisine to art to Economics to quantum physics to… well, there is too much to keep up with, but there's this interesting e-mail from Kotomi after being asked by Ushio about a certain curiosity that bugged her for too long.

"I found an abstract of the syndrome that you described as afflicting subject Ibuki Fuko. Basically, there appears to be an excess of dopamine and serotonin in the frontal lobe triggered by alpha waves and associated with the emotional functions of the amygdala. This triggers production of certain unknown hormones by a factor of ten or eleven, and these in turn react with spill-overs of dopamine.

Said products and the precursor hormones in turn build up in the bloodstream and finds its way to the artery of the spleen. These react with acidic substrates in the digestive tract to form gaseous by-products that travel down to the colon and out through the anus, and form bubbles upon contact with atmospheric nitrogen. The unique molecular configuration of the gas and associated compounds lend the bubbles a characteristic star shape…

* * *

><p>"Ushio," called Tomoya, "Are you up yet? You'll be late. Ryou told me you'll be walking to school today."<p>

"Coming! Just a moment."

He was getting more than a tad irritated. "I already had half a dozen 'moments' from you."

He had been hearing that funny latching noise for a half hour now. "Hey, if you're fixing something there, let me do it and get going! There is someone waiting for you outside."

He instantly heard a muffled crash, as if a door was slammed. After some more knocking over wood noise, the girl appeared, though it was obvious that her appearance was less fixed than usual.

"Ushio, what's the matter with you? Did you even take a bath?"

"I'm going!" The girl ran out as one frightened. Her heavy stuffed bag beat wildly against her and she let the door swing wildly as she went out. He could hear Ryou's bewildered reaction as it sounded that his daughter pulled her along.

"That girl…" he muttered.

Ryou was very much mystified by Ushio that morning. First, it seemed she was chased by a stampede of raging bulls, and now, just fifteen minutes later, she was carefree as can be. It does not matter; she still has an hour and a half to go before today's shift and she would have a wonderful chance to spend time with the girl.

Halfway to school the girl started to ask her some hard questions.

"You're a nurse, right?"

"Well, yes, certainly. What for?"

"Um…"

"Come on, don't be shy, it's not like we're not pals, right?"

"You might laugh at me."

And she did laugh. "You really look funny when you worry like that. It must be terribly important."

It took her another full minute of pause before she could finally blurt it out. "You don't think I'm gaining weight, do you?"

"What?" _Where did that come from?_ "You don't look it. You even look very athletic, to be sure. You even carry a stuffy bag. Maybe you got dumbbells in there?" She smiled shyly. "It is I who is rather concerned about my own figure now."

"Ryou-chan? Why would the guys mind your bod when you got the face?"

She just laughed. "Really, Ushio, that long hair of yours gives off a big impression of slimness."

"I'm talking about body, not hair." As if on cue, she pushed a bang out of eye's way. "But, well, of course, I'm still in danger of adding pounds, right?"

"Everybody is."

"Then perhaps it's time to take a gymnastics class."

"That would be wonderful. It will really fit you. But really, now, our walking to school is quite enough exercise for a build like yours. Though I know you can do far more than that."

Ushio laughed. It was wonderful to hear it, as her mother Nagisa was not much given to mirth, at least not to expressing mirth. It allayed her fears that perhaps her mother's condition will cling to her for the rest of her life. No, she has long since recovered, since that fateful nightmarish winter day.

"_Nagisa, save her!"_ wept Tomoya over the bed of his dying child, clinging to her cold, clammy hand.

_What was there to ask Nagisa for? She's gone, right?_

"Ryou-chan."

"Oh. Where are we?"

They were standing at the foot of the hill where the cherry trees bloomed. Most of the blossoms have since fallen off and were now littering the road, but a number remained on the branches. _There is something about the air of this place._

Ushio had stopped.

Was it from exhaustion, perhaps?

It probably is, as she could hear a slight panting. It must be the bag. It really looked much heavier than usual.

Suddenly, the girl opened the bag and took out reams and reams of canvas and thrust those into her arms.

"Can you please keep them for me? I don't have any more space at home. Just don't tell anyone. I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier."

_What's going on?_

"Well, sure," she stammered, not really knowing what she was saying. "Is that all?"

"The school's up ahead now." The girl flashed her a bright smile. "Gotta go."

And she ran up that long, long uphill path.

She instinctively took a glance at the papers.

_Oh…my…_

She stood there with dazed eyes and trembling hands as a cherry petal detached from a nearby tree and landed on her hair.


	3. Rout on the Roof

The manager handed Tomoya his pay envelope. It always feels good pinching that fat thing.

"Here's to our Employee of the Month!" called Yusuke. He clapped. Everybody clapped along.

"And here's your productivity pay," said the boss, handing another envelope. "You have worked harder and serviced more lines than any of us. Even if you couldn't get promoted, I'll make sure your efforts are always remembered."

"This is very touching, really," fumbled Tomoya.

"I should be proud of you," said Yusuke, "even if you always trump my performance record. I feel like a father who just raised a son who is better than he is."

"Cheers to the parent!" they all clamored.

Afterwards everybody got down to a little payday feast. Tomoya, however, is not given over to eating much.

* * *

><p>"It's Okazaki-san!"<p>

_Oh mother, not those guys again._

She quickly turned into another walkway, only to find more of the same.

"Okazaki-san, take me to Dr. Ichinose!"

"Okazaki! Okazaki!"

She had to turn back. Now, she's definitely late.

She went into another entrance of the same building where 3-B stayed. _Good thing I know the ropes of this campus._

Suddenly, at the other end of the hall her pursuers just entered.

_Drat—_

Now she had no idea where to turn next, save for the nearest gap that led away from them. Thankfully, there was one, but it led to another flight of stairs, which she took all the way to…

The rooftop.

Now, she's done for.

She could hear distantly but distinctly the clamor of the madding crowd. All she could do now was search for a hiding place, but the roof was murderously open. _Where…where…where…?_

Too late.

The door burst open and a flock of her fellow seniors appeared for the kill.

"Okazaki… you will tell us how to get to Dr. Ichinose, even if we must squeeze it out of you.'

"Just be nice, and tell us, and we won't hurt you."

She retorted, "And you actually thought of hurting someone just to get information she cannot give? I told you I met her only once."

Certainly, not everyone in the crowd had malicious intent, but the boys at the lead had their own ideas. Three broke off and surrounded her.

Ushio braced for an assault. She knew nothing much of martial arts, only a bit after a beginner's session in Jiu-Jitsu, a little boxing practice, and a smattering of a few others. But she'll have to do her best now.

She punched.

He caught.

The boy grasped her arm and twisted it. She gritted her teeth and whimpered in pain, but she wasn't so overwhelmed as to preclude clear thinking. She rammed herself against the fellow, who was stunned with the force and with disbelief at how much punch the girl can deliver. She then immediately ran to the farthest side from them where she was stopped by the railing.

Now, the boys are mad.

Spit. "Now, we'll teach you how a young lady should behave!"

"Teach this!"

A recorder flew straight across to the lead guy from behind and hit him in the head, knocking him forward.

"Akemi!" cried Ushio.

The girl dashed forward and jumped on his back to retrieved her bounced flute. She landed on her feet just in front of Ushio.

"You should know better than to pick on a lady!" To Ushio, "Hold this for me," tossing the flute to her. She then tied her hair for a fight.

Chii came in from behind and boxed another boy in the face.

"Are you OK, Ushio?" she said as she stood in beside Akemi.

She nodded. "Tell me if you need backup."

"Leave this to us!"

Round 1

Akemi Machine-gun kick:

100…300…650…880…1220…1450…

K.O.

Guy had to have his face blurred for young viewers.

Round 2

Guy: Hah! I'm good at catching punches.

Chii: Oh. That scares me.

(Thrusts two fingers in an upper-cut into his nose)

K.O.

Someone get a medic.

Final Round

The last guy got behind them somehow and grabbed Ushio.

"You give way or I'll squeeze her!"

"Ushio!" cried Akemi.

"You rotten cheat," snarled Chii.

He started to inch his way around them and the frightened crowd started to part.

From the gap flew an encyclopedia that hit him in his face.

Ushio broke free and ran into the arms of another senior. One of the boys who escorted her to Furukawa Bread the other day.

"Sora!"

"Are you fine, Ushio?" When he made sure of it, he turned to the enemy. "You were the ones who set that prank on Ushio! You never do know when to stop !"

"Eh?" said bad boy. Loud monstrous laugh. "A male. Guess we must give 'im some special treatment."

He took out from inside his uniform a chain. The crowd was visibly frightened.

"How did _that_ get into the campus?" "It's of a special alloy. It's meant for strangling!"

"And whipping!" bad guy added. With a hard lash, he chipped some of the concrete. Sora and Ushio desperately tried to prop up their courage.

"Akemi," said Chii. She nodded her agreement. In a split-second they rushed to the guy and before he could react they elbowed him behind each knee.

"Chii, the chain!" "Roger." She grasped it and strangled him only enough to weaken him, then proceeded to wrap him up in his own chain. Suddenly she felt him twitch so she instinctively pulled, spinning and flipping him over as if with a top, and he was about to fall face down when Akemi gave him airtime

1460…1500…1700…2005

and kicked him into thin air. He landed on his butt squarely fit into a dust chute.

The girls approached him.

Bad guy was bawling like a toddler. "No fair!" he whined through broken dentures. "Two versus one! This is no fight at all!"

"You brought a deadly weapon here and you even had the nerve!" hissed Akemi.

"This is skewed! This is rigged! This is unfair!"

Chii glanced for a moment at Akemi. The latter nodded her permission.

"Unfair?..." She nodded. "THIS! IS! HIKARIZAKA!"

And she kicked him into the chute.

Game Over...boys.

* * *

><p>Tomoya meant to shop for a month's hoard with the size of his pay. The nearest cheapest supermarket was some distance away, but it's OK to walk now as he was in no hurry after work, and the laptop will keep Ushio busy for a while…but he resolved to make up for lost time with a major feast from the spoils, him and her.<p>

Night was falling as he turned into the street, halfway to the mart. _Perhaps if I had taken the tram instead? If only I had a car; this district looked so clear of traffic. _The honking some distance behind was just so out of place in this quiet sector of his city.

_Crazy driver must be having a hard time. Maybe his transmission's jammed?_

The beeping came closer. Before he knew it, the car itself was beside him, trailing along his walking pace. And still beeping.

_What is this? _He thought a bit more apprehensively. _This guy's not supposed to rob me just because it's payday…maybe? I'm just a wage-earner. And he's got a car…_

_Why did I even walk at a time and place like this?_

To his further concern, the window slid open. The interior was dimly-lit. _Here goes… _Then, a voice. From inside. Calm and clear.

"Tomoya-kun."

"_What?" _He almost fainted from fright. "Seriously, if you want to play a joke on me, please don't involve someone I know."

"But it's me. Kotomi."

A light switched on, confirming the identity of the speaker. "Hop in. I think I know where you're going."

"Ah…n-no! It's a short distance now."

"Quit lying, Tomoya," she smirked. "All of us knows how far it is from here, even Sunohara."

"How could you know?"

"That's the place, or somewhere close, where Mei-chan said you were his Onii-chan. And you were denying it. But you looked really turned on. I got two witnesses."

Amazing how she could remember in detail. Such brainpower. It's Kotomi alright.

She opened the door. Tomoya, bewildered, torn over declining the offer and the more embarrassing thought of leaving the door open just like that, opted to get in...

"So the Yanks sent you back here?" said Tomoya as he fingered through the condiments section thinking of which oyster sauce to pick.

"Not exactly. There was an impasse in our current research. Too many hot words. The staff at Fermilab was scandalized. It could take anywhere from two to three months, I believe, to unmesh everything enough to move on. That's as much as I can tell you." She sighed. "Sometimes I just wish I was away from the States."

"So you're on vacation?"

She gestured a 'no'. "We barely take breaks. My colleagues just asked me if I could continue on our latest dissertation, or, if I choose, strengthen some linkages back here in Japan."

"Pretty tough being a genius, huh?"

She smiled weakly. "How's Ushio?" she asked as she picked out a bell pepper to put in her own cart.

"I gather you're having a good time online."

Warm smile. "She's my comfort abroad. Makes me want to see her again."

"Oi! Tomoya-san!" called a familiar middle-aged voice.

"Huh? Uh, Mrs. Isogai! How are you?"

"I see you're having a date of some sort, eh, young man?"

"W-What?" He chuckled nervously. "She's an old friend and we happened to meet outside so we thought we could shop together."

" 'Together', huh? Why, if a man and a woman stroll side by side in a supermarket and their carts had eaten the whole breadth of the aisle, I don't think you just 'thought' about it."

"Is that so? We'll give way."

She laughed. _She really was well-meaning, but she should have given some thought to what she was saying, shouldn't she? And why am I the only one answering her?_

"Shio-chan's going to be a lady soon. Must give her a mother while she could enjoy her minority."

_If only you weren't older than me…_

"I'll be going now." And the irksome neighbor carted away.

_Hey, Kotomi, aren't you going to lift a finger? She's insulting your professionalism. Sheesh, the people you meet overseas may not give a damn to things like this, but you're still Japanese, right?_

"This is not likely to reach the board."

So she was only caring about the board? _Goodness!_

Aside from that, she didn't appear to be moved. At all.

* * *

><p>"Your dad's not coming home?" asked a worried Akemi.<p>

The group of four huddled at the sala, Ushio bandaged and plaintive, Akemi apprehensive, Chii somewhat remorseful, and Sora more than a tad nervous. He didn't even dare look toward the door, not after how her father looked the last time. Still, with two other girls, he wouldn't be so mad, right?

"Ushio," said Chii, "I think I know now why you wouldn't want to mess with Dr. Ichinose. Ack!" she exclaimed boxing herself on the head, "Atashi no baka! All I could think of was getting to Tokyo."

"How will we explain this when Tomoya-san arrives?" mourned Akemi.

Just then the door opened and, to everyone's terror, Okazaki Tomoya appeared with a load of groceries. Following just behind with her own load…

Jaw drop, everybody.

"D-D-Doctor Ichinose…" murmured Chii, paling in fright.

"Oh goodness," wailed Akemi, "the lady herself! How could we explain this to either of them, let alone both?" Sora had his eyes on the floor.

Tomoya was visibly gritting his teeth in desperately restrained rage as he regarded Ushio's bandage. "Where are the vermin kept?" he hissed.

"N-N-No need, Mr. Okazaki," said Chii. "They had been already pre-whacked for your convenience. All three have been duly reported to the student council and the principal's office, as well. One of them is…dirty."

"I don't care how much dirt you put on them if they could be buried alive!" he thundered.

"Tomoya-kun," Kotomi mused, to herself, not thinking it wise to be so informal in front of the children.

"Papa, it's alright. My friends helped me. I'm safe now. If you want I won't go to school for some time."

"The hell you do! I'm keeping you here for a week!"

"That would be perhaps the best thing for now," broke in Dr. Ichinose. "I will tell this to Dr. Koumura over the phone. I'm sure he will understand."

Tomoya shot her a rueful glance. _You better. You had a hand in this._

"Children," said Dr. Ichinose, "I think you can go home now. We will stay behind to counsel her."

They were only too grateful to be out of this bind. And to be addressed by the lady herself, _personally._ After this day and tonight, things will not be same, for them.

* * *

><p>Instead of 'counseling' Ushio, Kotomi drove father and child back to Furukawa Bread so the girl could take a breather there while Tomoya was at work.<p>

"But you can't keep her here for too long," said Akio. "She might end up repeating the year like her mother."

"It's only a week, Furukawa-san," replied Kotomi. "I'll also call the school to begin selection immediately for the exchange program so there would be no more issues."

"It's my fault," sighed Ushio. "I mentioned the program without a thought. You should be in hot water in Hikarizaka now."

Kotomi laid a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Blame it on those pranksters. If it weren't for them, you two wouldn't be on the grounds on Saturday and, well, we wouldn't have met!" she smiled.

"Kotomi, you even had to joke at a time like this?"

"It is best to have humor at a time like this. We need to relieve everybody's tension. In fact, I am only too glad I came here on time before it got worse."

Akio cleared his throat. "I guess I must regret you came to our house on the tail of an emergency. The best we could give you now is to grill the fish fillet. Won't you, Sanae?"

"Hai," she smiled. "I will do my best. I will even add my best sandwich and jam!"

"Really, Sanae," he mumbled, "the fish will do."

"No need," chided Kotomi. "You don't have to throw a reception for good old me. I'll come here visiting every day or every other day, anyway."

Tomoya was shocked. He whispered to her. "Mrs. Isogai is just next door."

She gave him such a disconcerting look that it maddened him inside. It was a taunting stare. Like, "What on earth are you worried about that?"

_You're doing this on purpose, are you?_

She read his mind. "I only want to be close to Akio and Sanae-san, re-establish bonds long-severed. And to spend more quality time with Ushio." She turned to the girl. "Am I right, dear?"

She was just a bit overjoyed. "Are you sure, Dr. Ichinose-san?"

"Call me Kotomi-san, dear. Your father here does, without the –san."

_And you even had to emphasize that?_

Aloud, "Yes, Ushio, you said you wanted to share more thoughts with Dr. Ichinose, right?"

"Ah…," clamored Akio, "this looks like the best arrangement ever! Eh, Sanae, if those kids you tutor come over here I could even call this place (fanfare) The Furukawa International Academy of the Arts and Sciences! Complete With Faculty From Keno! Improve Your Child's Test Scores By Two Hundred Fifty Percent!"

_Gahhh! _thought a scandalized Tomoya. _You expect a Keno professor to stoop to grade schoolers? That's just outrageous!_

Worse, Kotomi just laughed at this. "I guess a pupil in primary school won't recognize me. I remember a Dartmouth colleague of mine who assists his autistic nephew on weekends, so this should be a peach."

Nothing's gonna stop her now.

* * *

><p>Kyou could feel the difference between teaching preschool before and handling grade school now. Kids are a lot tougher these days. There were those retar—er—inattentive pupils who were doing experiments under her nose while she rambled English and Nihongo grammar. Perhaps a little of Sanae's sweet influence will hold them, perhaps reform them, so she tramped with a paperbag-ful of visual aids and three of the rascals in tow for supplementary (read: remedial) instruction. "Don't break away from me on the road or I'll phone your folks right away!"<p>

At last, she reached Furukawa without undue trouble and she was quite relieved to see Sanae, who she had called earlier, smiling at the doorway.

"I hope you're not overloaded now," apologized Kyou.

"Don't you mind it, Kyou-chan, there are only two others inside now, and," this with a twinkle in her eye, "we have a new teacher to help us."

"Oh?" She went blank. When did Furukawa Bread have the resources to hire another one? "Isn't that a strain to you?"

"Oh no! It's free. She volunteered to tutor here as she is a very, very close friend of ours. I'm sure you'd know her when you see her."

Kotomi appeared behind Sanae and made her way beside her. She bowed.

"Konnichiwa, Kyou-chan."

Kyou dropped her bag.

_Oh my gracious… Is this her? She really looks it, even in plain clothes. The smartish Keno professor Tomoya boasted of. Why? Why did you appear just now?_

She put a trembling hand on her mouth and tried to hold back the tears. "Kotomi…" She clenched the hand into a quivering fist. Disbelief, bewilderment, and just plain joy. "Kotomi…you're back…You're back!" She threw herself onto the woman and held on desperately to her. "Kotomi, why did it take you so long to come back?" She held her at arm's length. "And you still remember me? Do you still remember Ryou? Tomoyo? Sunohara? Ushio…" Her voice started to break. "D-Do you even know what happened to Shio-chan?"

Kotomi was shocked. "What…What was it that happened to Ushio?" she stammered.

"Kotomi?...Kotomi, how could you not know? Didn't Tomoya tell you?"

Collecting herself, she regained her composure, mistaking what Kyou actually meant for the other day's incident. "Oh, that… Yes… I'm sorry about that."

Satisfying herself that she hasn't forgotten too much, she lovingly wrapped herself around her. "Kotomi," she whispered, choking, "Welcome back, welcome back."

* * *

><p>Ryou squealed with delight when she saw for herself that it was indeed Kotomi. Like her twin, she couldn't have enough of hugging a long gone friend.<p>

"Cut that out, sis," smiled Kyou, "or Kotomi won't be able to talk about abroad."

The gang chose Ryou's day off as a welcome party. This time it was at the Okazaki's apartment, but the Furukawas said they were following shortly. This party had the advantage of Kyou doing the cooking with assistance from the Okazakis. Kotomi wanted to see what was happening in the kitchen but chat with an excited Ryou held her down. At around nine the Furukawa couple arrived.

In the middle of the celebration they made a call to Youhei and Tomoyo and were glad to hear that they were having plans for an engagement as the man was expecting to be promoted in his job at the airport. Now there is less worry of an unstable future for them both. "It turned out that fellow would be better off than me in the end," chuckled Tomoya.

Afterwards they all sang a welcome song in honor of Kotomi. There was not one person in the house who was not glad enough to see her back.

The party lasted so deep into the night everybody went to sleep right there in the apartment. The twins lay their sleeping mats on the sala, and the Furukawas slept on Tomoya's bed, while Kotomi and Ushio shared the girl's bed. Tomoya cleared an old storeroom for himself.

* * *

><p>"Oh man," grumbled Ryou. The last week of her regular shift before her leave was about to resume.<p>

_Gotta get up soon. The doctor assigned me at the information desk.  
><em>And she had to drop by her flat to shower and everything.

She decided to stretch outside at the balcony first. It was still dark at about quarter to five, but the black of the eastern sky was beginning to fade into deep blue and the morning star blazed there.

Brrr… It's quite cold out here in these pyjamas. Nobody else would get the nerve to stay outside at this hour…

…except a girl standing below her in the street with her back turned to her.

"Shio-chan." She went down to her, and gazed in bewilderment at the girl. "You've been standing there all this time?"

No reply. Her nurse's instincts would make her tell the girl that she would catch a cold, that she was not having enough rest. Instead, something else came out.

"You're not thinking of her again, are you?"

No answer.

On second thought, she did answer. Standing out here all alone spoke volumes. It said that she did not feel comfortable with so many people in the house. It said she wanted a moment for herself. It said that she was grieving.

"Oh Ushio," she breathed in a breaking voice, "I'm so sorry. I disturbed you."

She came to her and embraced. Neither of them spoke anymore or responded whatsoever. They did not cry. They just closed their eyes. Theirs was a mutual understanding.

From now on that which the girl had kept so jealously to herself was completely in the hands of another person, whom she trusted as if with her own life.


	4. Undead Feelings

_Do you even know what happened to Shio-chan?_

What was it that could possibly have happened to Ushio? Kotomi was quite puzzled as she wove through downtown traffic in Kobe. She thought it was the row at school, but the concern in Kyou's voice was reserved for something disastrous. It wasn't as if the girl had a close brush with death… perhaps?

What the heck, from what she had heard Ushio could have gotten hospitalized from that gangster chain. Yes, that's just what Kyou was talking about.

_That girl. Suddenly I want to know more about her._

* * *

><p>The school selection committee finally chose two students for Dr. Ichinose's program. As was hoped for, the furor at school had died down, and students actually wanted to see Ushio again, as a normal buddy, but Tomoya still refused to have his daughter attend classes until <em>he<em> felt the situation safe enough for his child.

As such, Kotomi had the girl schooled in her own home (yet another arrangement with Dr. Koumura). Well, actually, they held classes down at the refurbished garden. The woman didn't want anything inside the house to trigger unsolicited curiosity. _That_ issue was already laid to rest long ago, courtesy of Tomoya and friends.

Ushio knew all along how well-endowed Dr. Ichinose was in the way of physical appearance, but being with her regularly at close range opened up a whole new dimension of her to the girl.

_She looks so royal. Her violet dress really fits her. _

_She has the mind of a great sage. And the voice, too. It fits her name, a harp. Or, like a waterfall from a distance. Calm and reassuring, but showing its might. _

_Yes, I think I should call you waterfall, Kotomi-san. I've heard of people who look wise but hold only air, and idiotic fellows who show a glimmer of insight when they choose, but you…you are smart and look every bit that way._

And that giggle…

"Ushio," she smiled gently, "I see you're very much absorbed in our discussion. I won't blame you. Spherical harmonics is not much of a high school subject, so I only touched lightly on it. You will tell me if you have a hard time catching up, though?"

"Ah—huh?" she stammered, caught in her reverie. "Ah, no. It's OK. I think I get a few basics here and there."

She caressed her hair at the nape. "Actually, I'm delighted at your progress. And you do not sleep through any of the harder stuff."

The girl blushed. "But of course, Dr. Kotomi-san. It's not right. Not when someone could get the privilege of being taught by you." She looked at the woman significantly. "You know, I really feel like an aristocrat. It's in world history, right? That the children of nobles were tutored at home by the greatest minds of the day. And Alexander the great. He had Aristotle to teach him."

Another enchanting giggle. "Really now, you know how to turn a professor's head."

"No! I'm serious. Kotomi-san. You're a gem that I have found."

_Oh, Ushio…_

"No, Ushio, you're wrong." She guided her hand to the girl's face and passed over her cheeks as with an exquisite jade vase. And held it. Her eyes delved straight into the girl's own, diving into the bottomless tide of those pools.

"I should be the one saying it to you."

There could only be expectation when someone intelligent gazes in the eyes of another.

And then she saw something…

What was it?

Kotomi instinctively lowered her stare."What's wrong, Kotomi-san?" the girl asked, concerned.

A breeze whipped up across the yard and lifted leaves and twigs. It lifted Kotomi's hair as well, sending it into a mellifluous flight, as with a giant flag across the heavens.

Ushio could not speak at the sheer beauty of the sight, much less register what the professor said next.

"Beneath the tides of Sleep and time…strange fish are moving."

_Whut—_

"Kotomi-san?"

_Ushio, what a fitting name you have._

* * *

><p><em>What could possibly have happened to her?<em>

Long after the girl had gone home and night had fallen, Kotomi was still in the garden. She could hardly decide whether to go in or stay out. Inside are the memories of her father and mother. She knew that they had loved her all this time, but she still misses them intensely every time she is in that room. Out here, she would remember the girl, and what she saw in her.

The world is so full of secrets, no matter where you go.

* * *

><p>This was just the right time.<p>

There were no visitors at the cemetery as it was only seven in the morning. It was a lovely place. Most of the graves were plaques that lay inconspicuously on the ground. What could be easily seen was the well-manicured greenery and stands of evergreens. The warblers and robins celebrated new life over death in their song.

There was a recessed area secluded by a grove of maples. Not that it was really a secret place. If one took the trouble to walk some distance from the path, it could be easily reached. Still, the leafy screen prevented any cursory look from finding the place out. Just enough privacy.

In that grove stood one of the few traditional pillar-type stone markers.

Hiiragi Kappei.

Ryou had carefully placed a set of three wreaths at the foot of the marker. She would have wanted to place more, for the sake of doing something to occupy herself, but there was nothing left to place. Besides, the memorial park was a place for contemplation and remembrance, not activity. A fact that hammered at her mercilessly.

Now, she only stood there with her eyes on the ground. _The engraving job was a fine one, _she said to herself, regarding how well-executed the kanji on the marker was. Actually she had a short course on calligraphy back in her college days. The beauty of oriental characters has never ceased to amaze her. Perhaps, if she had learned Mandarin, she might embellish the marker a little more.

Finally, after almost two hours of distracting herself, there was nothing left to think of.

Ryou can be graceful and demure even under duress, a quality that marked her out as a nurse. Other nurses were of course obliged to be this, but she can acquit herself well enough right inside the operating room if need be.

That was in the hospital. Out here in private and in front of that name, it was a radically different matter.

As soon as her mind went blank, what she had long repressed rushed in to fill the vacuum. She abruptly heaved, wildly, as though a parasite monster inside her was about to burst out of her back. The monster possessed her and manifested itself in her wild gaze, her bared clenched teeth, her heavy panting and her gnarled hands ready to tear out anything it laid itself on. She let out an ear-rending howl as she clutched her head.

She proceeded to tear apart the wreaths she had placed…flower by flower…petal by petal…throwing everything at the name in front of her.

"Devil! Curse you! Go to hell!"

With the wreaths gone, she clawed at the ground and tore out earth and grass, and flung these violently at the marker.

"Curse you! Devil! Devil!...Curse you!...Go to…hell…"

She was now spent. She fell on her feet at the foot of the marker and clung to it, with nothing left but flowing tears watering what was left of the grass.

"Kappei," she managed to choke out, "why can't you…let me move on? Why must…I always come back to you? Isn't it…enough…to see you go?...

"Ushio…why have you done this to me?"

She hung on until midday, and it was already so hot it nudged her to get going. She found herself walking down the road just outside the cemetery. By now she was calmer, but a little concern remained. She knew she won't be able to relate that easily to Tomoya and the rest after this.

Just then, she heard a motorcycle rush behind her. It pulled up right in front of her.

"Hop in," the helmeted driver said, and opened the visor.

"Onee-chan…"

They tore through the highway at blinding speed. Kyou had to drop her sister off to her radiology class and get back for her afternoon shift in time.

Ryou was grateful for the helmet. It hid the anguish that was starting to bud on her face.

"Onee-chan, how could I even sit next to you? What if you find out?"

* * *

><p>"Oi! Ushio!" called Chii.<p>

Did they just hear her?

But people said this was the place. Heck, how could it be? All the houses in the neighborhood look the same. Nearly all of them have yards. _Darned neighbors…_

She decided to jump and hold on to the top of the wall and take a peek. _Sheesh, don't look at me, they forced me to do this._

"Excuse me…"

Chii nearly fell off from fright. Below her was a maidservant in plain clothes wearing only her maid apron. And a snarling Doberman pinscher.

"High school children are such rascals nowadays. Do you know I can get you expelled from Hikarizaka just for this?"

"Sorry…" she struggled, feeling her arms ache but too scared of the dog. It looked like the silent-killer type. "I just want to know if this is Dr. Ichinose's residence."

The maid was taken aback. "And what on this earth could you have anything to do with Madam Ichinose? You choose the jokes you play on people, brat!"

"Well, excuse me, ma'am...I only happened to know…ugh…a certain Ushio Okazaki…being kidnapped and…detained in that house so the good doctor can…perform experiments on her. Well, I must say Miss Okazaki is the perfect specimen. Her lungs are healthy…her heart, her liver, her kidneys, her spleen…"

The maid was terribly scandalized. "Oh…you really pushed me now…grrrr…" Suddenly, "Wait, you know Miss Okazaki?"

"The hell I do!" She managed to vault up the top of wall. She tried to catch her breath. "And if I must pry the roof open just to rescue her, I will!"

This time, the maid laughed. The kid's not threatening anymore, just making an idiot of herself. "The gate is open. They're in the yard. Sorry for the trouble, but I heard even just an eight-year-old boy before managed to find his way right into our garden."

True enough, an exhausted and disheveled Chii found her classmate in the garden. Sitting right there with—

"Aargh!" She quickly dived behind the maid. It's her! She was far more scared of the professor than of the dog. "Oh man, I can't face up to her looking like this!"

"Madam. We got a guest."

Ushio for her part, could recognize a friend from afar off with her back turned. Especially with that hair antennae she adopted from Akio. "Chii!... Excuse me, Kotomi-san."

She went over to her friend. "Come on now, girl, she won't bite."

"Yes, but she will curse, she will stare, she will condemnify to this earth and to Mars!"

"Madam," the maid said with a smirk, "I heard she said you were conducting experiments—"

"NO! I said Ushio and I will be having an experiment."

"She mentioned something about human organs."

"No!…Did I mention human organs? Did you even hear me mention the words 'human' and 'organ'?"

"Oh," said Kotomi to the maid, "you mean my paper on the feasibility of cryostasis for stem cells up to fifty years? She must have read that. I didn't know you were so studious." The professor stood up.

"Yes," she heaved in relief. Though still not daring to look up. "The truth is, I only came here to fetch Ushio, madam. Everybody at school's looking for her. It's been half a month now." To Ushio, "Hey, girl, why is your dad so paranoid?"  
>"No. Kotomi-san herself suggested I could stay with her and she will have me credit for all the time I was away. In fact, I think I have already finished the school year on my own, and beyond."<p>

"Oh?" she ventured, still cowering. "Lucky you. Not everyone gets the chance of not having to go to school."

"Hmmm, it looks like our guest needs a fresh change of clothes."

"Aaagh!" Dr. Ichinose was right behind her.

"Otsu, would you get some for her? I think we should let Ushio's guest feel comfortable with us."

"Right away, Madam. And concerning the organs—"

"No! I mean yes! Yes Madam! The organs…I-I mean the dresses…Get the dresses—Oh man, no, I'm not ordering."

The maid laughed out loud. Ushio and Kotomi simply exchanged amused expressions.

"Don't worry, Chii," the girl said. "You'll be perfectly fine with us."

* * *

><p>Kyou's laugh could be heard at the other side of town.<p>

"Dang, this sitcom's terribly awesome! You sure have a good taste, sis."

"Puhurr" grunted Botan in agreement.

Ryou was also keeping herself from bowling over. "I know where to buy the DVDs," she finally managed to say. "I got a friend in Kyoto who could get you the discs thirty percent off."

Still laughing, "Please, sis, don't give me more yet. This alone's getting on me."

A little while later they were watching American baseball with Ryou's serving of takoyaki and iced tea. She also brought a few truffles for Botan.

"I just know the Mets will lose this season."

"It's too early to tell."

"That line of yours... You can tell a season's end from the way it was played from the start!"

"Puhurr! Puhurr!" agreed Botan.

"So many things can change," said Ryou as she sipped down the last of her tea. "Even a moment can change everything."

"See that batter over there?" She paused to chomp down her takoyaki. "He's just a rookie and they decided to put him in the first inning already. Team's got pretty weird decisions these days."

"You sound like you know the sport too well, sis."

"Eh... What the heck?" She chucked some more into her mouth. "Still, it looks weird to me."

"No less weird than when we were playing against the real experts back in high school."

A glimmer rose in Kyou's eyes. "That? Hmmm... We were playing for our town, I remember, not our school."

"I don't care. It's not like we can find the time to play again."

"Hey," Kyou replied brightly. "Why not? The gang's complete except only Tomoyo and Youhei. Even Kotomi's here. We can just have Ushio stand in for…"

An uneasy silence fell over them as the commentator blared on on TV.

At length, Kyou broke her own silence with a laugh. "We're too old for that now."

Ryou responded with a soft chuckle of her own.

Baseball ended after two hours, and now, at almost midnight, they were watching action, Kyou fingering through the French fries. "Man, this is bland."

"All action movies are bland to you," Ryou shrugged.

"It's because of all those cliche moves they do. If I am to see a repeat fight it has to be over-intense."

She sighed. "What could possibly be 'over-intense'? Burn people alive, maybe..."

"Hmmm... A horror type of action. Zombie apocalypse?"

"Sheesh. That's unrealistic. Plain action movies may look boring on screen, but I doubt it would be so if you were there."

She laughed. "There's no such entertainment like that!" She stretched out to relieve her couch-potato muscles. "I think I should get some gore for a change."

"Blah. It's all nonsense. Nothing but tearing things apart. It's just like you just want to break all the plates in the house just for the thrill of it, only that it's flesh."

"Haha. Look who's talking. It's the girl who tears her notebooks and stuff apart whenever she's really mad. Like, when's the last time you tore something apart?"

Ryou looked as if she got stoned with mud.

"Onee-chan…"

"Huh? What's with that look?" She made a sarcastic demon snicker. "Don't tell me you're scared."

"No! W-Why should I?"

Snicker...

"Onee-chan! Cut that out, will you?"

She croaked her most monstrous bass. "Zoooombies are out theeeere. They will eeeat your brains. Maybe I should taaaaake you to the _cemetery._"

Her twin let out a genuine scream before cutting herself short. _Why am I showing this in front of Onee-chan? _

It took Kyou but a split-second to detect something amiss.

"Hey, don't get worked up!" she laughed nervously. "It's not like you're afraid of graveyards. You're not like that." Then, she calmed down, mystified. "Hmmm. Come to think of it, I think I saw you near the memorial park last time when I fetched you."

_Oh no, please…_

"You were visiting Kappei?"

...

Now Ryou couldn't stop herself. Her lips quivered violently and her eyes demonstrated real shock. Her face was blanched white.

It took an even shorter split second for her twin to understand, to make sense of everything.

In a blink she caught Ryou's shoulders and probed into the frightened lady's eyes with hers.

"I thought you said you would forget him."

"I tried," she whined. "I tried my best."

And all that visiting Tomoya. All that bringing him food, fixing his house, all too often. Without her telling even, as it was back in Hikarizaka High. Kyou's face grew hard. Her fists clenched. Why, that...

"And I thought you truly loved him!"

_Slap!_

"How dare you use Tomoya like that! Did you even sense that you were trying to turn his head so he could fit into the mold you were casting? All this time? _All this time!_"

"Onee-chan," she finally wept, "Onee-chan…"

"_Don't 'Onee-chan' me! _I don't know _anyone _who mercilessly uses people! I'm _not _related to rotten schemers. _Understand?"_

Ryou was now all opened up and one big puddle of a weeping mess. There was nothing to hide now. All the pain in her just spilled out; the tears leaked out rapidly as blood would from a heart thrust with a katana. Tears are indeed the blood of a wounded heart.

It was a last split-second that made Kyou see how much damage Ryou had suffered all along. Suddenly she felt really bad for the one, who, blindly groping, could think of no other way to heal herself, and in the end, was worse off. And she was supposed to protect her!

Thus transformed, she knelt down to take her twin into her arms. She now joined her in mourning. It was now crystal-clear to her that the pain she herself harbored over Tomoya, long since weathered and worn, had been taken into a whole new plane in what her sister went through.

* * *

><p>"Chii," whispered Akemi. They were having lunch in the clubroom and the others members had chosen to eat out.<p>

"Hm?" Her mouth was full and could not respond properly.

"Chii, you won't tell anyone, right?"

She guzzled down her softdrink and beat her chest to hold it all in. "I'm in no mood for showbiz."

"Chii…Did you ever hear me talk showbiz?"

"Nope. I just thought you were already infected by the schoolgirl disease. Darned Japan."

"Chii, you got to listen to me. She's taking Ushio away."

"A girlfriend? Gah, of all the romance a young teenager can get she chose to give in to one of her own."

"CHII CUT THAT OUT!" She was standing already.

"Wha—Hey... You don't have to take me seriously you know."

"This is serious, Chii. Dr. Ichinose is taking Ushio to America!"

…

In an instant Akemi realized that she had blurted it out loud so she sat down red-faced, hands on mouth. "You think anyone heard us?" she whispered again.

"Hey…it's lunch. They're at the cafeteria…perhaps?"

"You don't even feel bad about her. Do you even care?"

"Sheesh. You're one frightened gal. Just because the good doctor's from America and Ushio's with her all the time, doesn't mean she's gonna live with her for good. Stop missing her already, will you? She's just fine. I even went to their place and not one shred of anything about America did I hear from them."

She looked awed. "You really went there? You were with Dr. Ichinose?'

"Of course!" she bragged, rubbing her finger under her nose. Didn't care to mention how palpably shy she was sitting there the whole day with the professor, though. "We had a scientific lecture seminar and Dr. Ichinose said I could win the Nobel Prize."

"Now it's you who's talking showbiz."

"Well, then," she flourished, "let's see who of us has the taller tale! You tell me Ushio's going with Dr. Ichinose back to the States. Didn't you hear that the school board had already finished selection for the exchange program? A published fact: Hikarizaka High School had recommended two seniors, Jomon Takeo and Hayashibara Kenji, for enrollment in the student exchange, that would take them to a university in Seattle, Oregon, USA, or in Houston, Texas, either of which is a stepping stone to NASA. A farewell program will be sponsored by the prefectural government on 15 June, Wednesday, at four in the afternoon. Attendance is by invitation. Not that we'll be given any. And the keynote speaker is, well, Dr. Ichinose Kotomi! Now, what do _you_ have to say?"

Her response was quick. "I also asked that, but Ushio said the professor's taking her _personally_. Dr. Ichinose will have her work part-time in the US on a working visa after she graduates. After she arranges for her greencard, Dr. Ichinose will have her enroll directly at an Ivy League school—on her own recommendation! She says this is so that her studying abroad won't have to pass through Hikarizaka and cause another ruckus."

Finally, Chii was at the end of her tether. "Was it…Ushio…who said that?"


	5. The Shadow of Nagisa Furukawa

_So this is Sanae's bread now? _Doesn't look it. Akio even smelled the thing tentatively and detected nothing, just plain cooked flour. It even looked bland, a far cry from her usual botched experiments. Nonetheless, the very fact encouraged him to, for the first time in who cares how long, taste it on his own.

It's bland.

There was no taste _at all, _save for traces of the original dough, and a little saltiness. _Salt? _It really is not like her to bake anything even remotely salty. But this is just like soda crackers. From putting her wholehearted effort into creatively ruining her pastries, it seems she had lapsed into mindlessly baking raw dough. And turn out what could well be soda crackers. Plain, old, normal soda crackers.

_Ack! For the first time in the history of mankind, Sanae turns out of the oven something normal. _Finally, for a change, he can genuinely praise his wife's bread.

"Sanae! Let's celebrate! You made a breakthrough! I knew my wife was a master! Haha!"

But when he entered the baking area, he was surprised to see his wife on her knees and face down over moist dough on the tray, crying. Her tears dripped onto the batch and her mouth was half-buried.

"Sanae! What happened?"

Her anguished voice was muffled in the dough.

Akio took hold of her and made her rise. He wiped away the tears and dough from her face. "Tell me, what's bothering you?"

"They're taking our baby away," she choked.

"What do you mean?"

"Ushio…Aka-chan…" was all he could make out through the heavy sobbing.

He understood. It was also like this, before, when Ushio was five years old. Same reason, same conclusion.

"It's all right now, Sanae," he repeated.

* * *

><p>Ushio and Akemi sat on the two swings in the park, while Chii stood with her back turned to them.<p>

"Ushio," mumbled Akemi, "I thought we would all go to college together."

She wanted to say something in reply, but her words were lost.

"You said we would find work together and save our way through our studies. You said it didn't matter if we could only find a company somewhere near. You thought we could be both dentists eventually. Even if I was scared of blood."

"Hey," interrupted Chii, "you left me out, haven't you?"

Finally, Akemi broke down. "Why does it have to be like this? Why can't it last?"

Ushio's face grew hard. She clenched her fists as a bitter truth returned to her, but then she calmed herself, knowing it was no use to rave against it.

"Nothing can escape change. Fun and happy things…they can't possibly stay that way."

"No way, Ushio!" she shouted through the tears. "No way! No way! Why, Ushio? Why are you pushing us away?"

_No, I'm not. I hate those words as much as you do. They're not mine._

_Those are what my father told me._

_He was quoting my mother._

* * *

><p>My father had just told me to stop crying.<p>

We were on the train after we had been at the flower meadow. He had just been whispering mother's name. Weeping.

After that, he continued with how they had met at the foot of the hill. He mentioned those words. Mother's words. Perhaps he decided a girl my age would not understand them, and I didn't, but I remembered them. Those very words.

What was it that he said was his reply to her?

It must have been nightfall. It was so unusually dark.

And yet just a moment ago, everything was white and bright with that beautiful snowfall.

"Daddy?... I love you."

"I love you too, Ushio."

...

"USHIO!"

"No."

"I don't want it."

"I don't want..."

"…want…"

_Want…want…want…_

_Ushio!...Ushio!...Ushio!..._

_Want…want…want…_

_...  
><em>

_I love you, papa, _I kept thinking as I sank into a white bottomless nothing. I knew I had lost control of my body. There was nothing but echoes all around me. Those, and the bottomless waste.

_I love you, papa._

My own thoughts sounded hollow.

The words themselves were empty.

Empty words…empty words…

_If you truly love papa, _I felt, _you will not leave him. He has lost everything._

_You will not leave him._

Funny, I thought I heard reverberations. They were also from papa. Calling out to mama.

That was just pathetic. Mother cannot hear him. She's dead. Right?

But _I_ can hear him. _I can still hear him._ I am the one to answer, not mother.

I will try this one time. I can still recover control. I might still get him…

I raise my hand…

* * *

><p>I have always loved Sanae-san. When I was small I even mistook her for my real mother. Even then, at eight years old, I still prefer to think of her that way. Heh, she looks like it, anyway.<p>

It's so wonderful having a mother.

And I know how much she returns my affection.

"Ushio," she said, tired after over an hour at work at the oven, nearly slumped on a chair, "come here. Sit," she motioned, referring to her lap.

And I was crazy with joy over that. Nothing made me happier than sitting in her lap. I didn't feel too big for that, and I didn't care. All that mattered was sitting on that lap.

As soon as I settled there, Sanae-san cuddled me and smelled my hair. She really has a thing to it. With it was that pleasant rubbing of my back. I don't know what you think of her bread, but her rubbing was just heavenly. The baking work and the years never took the softness out of her hands. She was so beautiful herself. I counted myself so fortunate to have such a beautiful mother. I reached out to touch her face, to toy with her drooping hair antennae, and when I did it, her face was suffused with love. And she had that small laugh that told me how tickled and pleased she was.

She gave me kiss on the cheek, and it seemed to have lasted an hour because I relished it so much. As much as she did.

And later, she even had her deepest, most beautiful voice when she hummed me a lullaby. That afternoon I was about to drift off to sleep as usual, only that I heard her say

"Nagisa…"

It's that name. Strange, I almost never heard it said, but whenever it was, it really sounded weird. Like when papa said it over and over in the train. I never did muster the courage or even enough interest to ask, but this time I wanted to know.

"Sanae-san, why did you say mama's name?"

"Huh?"

"Sanae-san…"

"Oh." She made a tentative smile.

"Well… Mama… Your mama was so precious to us." She combed my bangs back in place. "She was our light and joy."

She paused for a second, and then, "She was our dream. We gave all our dreams to her."

I was puzzled. "How did you give your dreams to mama?"

Just then, I thought I saw her hesitate, as if she had blurted out something she shouldn't. But now, having mentioned it, she must have resolved to go on. She knew she couldn't keep anything from me now.

"Aka-chan…"

I was waiting.

"Aka-chan," she began, "your mama was almost the same age as you are now, back then…"

...

"So she didn't die, right?"

"Yes, aka-chan, she didn't."

"Then why is she dead now?"

To my surprise, her eyes widened, as if terrified. Of me.

"Ushio…"

"Sanae-san," I said in earnest, "I have to know. Why did she die? What killed her?"

"Ushio…" was all she could say, as tears welled up in her. Then, "Ushio, please, don't…"

But she can't keep anything from me now.

...

After I heard everything I could not believe it.

That is not true!

_I love mommy. I love mommy. I love mommy. I love mommy. I LOVE MOMMY!_

_I love papa. I didn't leave him. I came back for him. Just for him._

Now I knew why I came back. It was to pay for what I did. It was to be tied to him, shackled to him, enslaved to him, for doing it.

* * *

><p>Tomoya was not at all comfortable returning to this place. This was odd, for he was the one who did the most to bring life back to this garden. And to her life. Helping her out was one of the fondest memories he and the gang all had together, including Nagisa.<p>

But now he will be alone with her. Hopefully, perhaps, this could still be the wondrous time of companionship and remembrance that they did together the last time he came here, when he took her hand and led her out of the gloom of her house and her past. Perhaps, also, if only for that, he could make her reconsider.

"Tomoya," she said, "you remember this flower, right? It is a Lily of the valley."

He smiled. "I don't really have a thing about plants."

"And these are snapdragons. You filled the entire bed over there with these, haven't you?"

"I don't even remember the names."

She laughed. "You really looked wonderful, you know. You, Nagisa, Kyou and Ryou. I felt embarrassed when I saw what you did to the garden, but I really felt warmed."

"Kotomi, you were always that important to us. You still are."

"And that's a California poppy," she continued. "And over there is a pansy. Tomoya, do you remember when I showed those flowers to you?"

"…"

Laugh. "Oh I see. That's even further back. You know, I can still recall just how cute you were when you were small. Did you know how good it felt seeing you and being with you here in the garden?"

She's getting cheesy. Better bring this up before the issue's dribbled away entirely. But first…

"No, I can't recall things half as good as you do," he smiled. Then he grinned. "But I do remember one thing," he added cheerfully. "You were good at the violin back when you were a kid."

It worked. Now, she doubled over in laughing._ Good. The mood is set._

"Kotomi—"

"You were," still chuckling, "my only friend. I had waited for you for so long." She looked at him significantly. All the mirth was gone all of a sudden. _Drat. _"You may not remember," she said with but a trace of reproach. "You may have put all the years and all the miles between us, yet, unbeknownst to you, our bond only grew stronger with time and distance."

Tomoya saw that he still had a chance and seized it. "Then for the sake of our friendship, please, ask Ushio before you make such a move. She has never been outside this prefecture for so long, and now you will suddenly thrust her to a different country altogether."

"What do I have to ask her for?"

_What the... _This was getting harder than he expected. "You must still respect her decisions, even if she is a child."  
>She looked directly into his eyes the same way she did to Ushio. But it was the other way around. This time, the hidden reproach was obvious for him to see. She stared at him just to let him see what's in her.<p>

"It's as if _you _had respected her to begin with."

It hit him. Hard. Hard and fast.

He did not believe a person so intelligent as to literally read minds could exist. But she had just found him out, without probing him! No…it can't be. No. It's not that way! She must have ferreted it from Ushio!

"There is only one person left that could be so close to her as to be able to inflict deep and lasting anxiety on her. You. Or perhaps Sanae-san. But it's you who is with her most of the time.

"Or, to put it another way, her anxiety, what she feels, all redounds to you."

"Kotomi!" He was now struggling to keep himself from trembling. "You are accusing me! How could—"

"Going back to the first argument, it could not be Sanae-san, for a grandmother could not have so much sweeping powers of dictation over a child in this patriarchal society. Eh, Tomoya?"

But he could not stop gnashing his teeth.

"Tomoya, you may have thought I became but a halfbreed ever since I moved to the States. Yes, I may not be that much Japanese anymore. But I know _you are."_

"Kotomi…" He was now trying to hold back tears. "I beg you."

"After I have brought her there, Akio and Sanae will be grateful to me. Ushio will be grateful to me. I can pull all of you out of this stagnation. You will be grateful to me. You will think of me as more…more than just an old friend…when you see how much I changed the life of your family."

_So that was it. Poisoning the water to kill the fish…_

"No, Kotomi. You're wrong. How can you possibly speak up for my own family? How can you speak up for Ushio? _I_ am her father. I am the only one."

"You only want to keep her for yourself. To languish along with you in this same town. To follow in your delinquent footsteps."

"I am the only one!" he shouted. "Only I can protect her! I promised Nagisa!"

"Where is your Nagisa?" she thundered. "Where is your protection? How well had your father protected you? How well did my parents protect me? Can you protect your child as good as you can save your wife?"

"_Do you like snow, daddy?"_

There was nothing left to say. Everything… Everything she said hit the mark. He fell on his fours in anguish and started to shed copious tears. "Please, Kotomi, please, don't tell her anything!"

"There is no way you can protect her, Tomoya. Now more than ever. She is grown. The only thing you can do, is _not _to protect her. Let. Her. Go."

He can feel it drain out of him. His strength. His manliness. His _usefulness. No. No way. No way! I promised Nagisa._

He had promised Nagisa. He can still fulfill it, actually, he kept trying to tell himself. But in the end he knew he's not "the only one" anymore. From now on, if he must keep his pledge, he must not, at all costs, part from this woman.

_I was the first in your life, Tomoya. And I will be the last. For good._

* * *

><p>There was nothing left to say.<p>

Tomoya felt there were iron balls chained to his feet as he trudged the whole awful way back to the apartment. There was nothing to left to do, too, he also knew. Right now his mind was fixed on a single task.

He took the keys to Ushio's room. He entered. There wasn't too much stuff to pack, in the room was only a wardrobe and drawer, another bin for her summer clothes, and a third. There was a lot of trivia at the table under the mirror, though. On top was the PC. The fairly large mattress of course could not be folded away conveniently enough for travel, especially with the dango plushies there.

_Dango…dango…dango…dango…_

He shook his head vigorously and actually knocked his own head. _Pull yourself together, Tomoya, _he told himself. This is no time to fall into reminiscing. Nothing could come out of it. Only pain.

_Dango…dango…dango…dango…_

_Damn it! _It suddenly became an earworm. Sucking his blood. No, he can't stop now, even as the cranky, outdated tune gnawed away at him. He must fight back the tears. There had been too much of it already.

_Dango…dango…dango…dango…_

"_Papa, can you sing Mama's song?"_

_Dango…dango…dango…dango…_

He took out the first batch of dresses and dumped it on the bed. He folded. He stashed. He zipped. He opened more drawers. He took out. He dumped. He folded. He stashed. He zipped. He opened more drawers. Repeat. Anything to put something in his head. But it was a sinking ship he is trying to salvage. His boat has a terrible leak, and he was pumping mightily with his little rusty bucket, but in vain, as more water sprung into the holds of his lower decks. He was fighting for his life in Nagisa's dango ocean.

_Dango…dango…dango…dango…_

He folded. He stashed. He zipped. He opened more drawers. Repeat.

_Dango…dango…dango…dango…_

He folded. He stashed. He zipped. He opened more drawers. Repeat.

_Dango…dango…dango…dango…_

He folded. He stashed. He zipped. He opened more drawers—

Curses! It's locked!

He fumbled for the keys. He tried one after another. None seemed to work. He must try again. He is now crazy from the wasted effort. He jammed the key that did fit and strove to open it, even if he must break the drawer itself. It clicked. Finally! But it would not give. _Aaaah! _He couldn't take any more. He released his pent-up stress in an angry and abrupt pull that sent the drawer flying onto the middle of the room and spilling its overstuffed pile of canvas. No wonder it wouldn't budge.

_What the hell are those?_

Gingerly, very gingerly, Tomoya took a step, and checked.

_What the HELL!_

Drawings.

Pictures of dangoes. Pictures of Nagisa. Dangoes. Nagisa. Nagisa. _All Nagisa!_

"Papa…"

He turned to see his daughter in the doorway. She had just come home from school after he let her answer a call to a clandestine interview with Dr. Koumura. He was planning to tell to pack her things as soon as she arrives.

"Papa…" She didn't say another word. She ran out with her uniform on.

Finally, his ship sank. Him, too, again on his fours, clutching those canvases.


	6. This Old Town

My special thanks to Bored Failure for giving my first review. (I have checked the site over and over just to see if any had come in.) And it was a balanced one. An honest review indeed goes a long way for a writer.

I don't mind if we have differences in taste. Just saying that you "eagerly wait" for my next chapter is more than enough boost for me to continue writing. Thanks a lot! As for your questions, I hope you would be able to satisfy them in this chapter. So, one eagerly awaited chapter, coming up!

To everybody else, I would be happy to find more reviews! But even if not, I still invite you to read!

The Tides, Chapter Six

* * *

><p>Before, it was him who could not bear seeing his own daughter's face. Now, it was the other way around. Regardless, he was coming back to the same place, to solve the same but flipped-over problem.<p>

He still remembers the house, even though there had been improvements and changes in the structure. No doubt, it was the work of Naoyuki, his own father. It was a signal to him that he had picked up his life where it left off.

As he knocked at the door, he couldn't help but wonder. Not how Shino and Naoyuki were, he knew that well enough, but how they would respond seeing him there. It seemed that, after his father went home to his own mother and he had the burden of each other released, it did not matter if they saw each other again or not. Nonetheless, they were still father and son. Nothing could change that. But still, how would they react to each other if those two situations were combined? The answer did not take long in coming.

"Oh, Tomoya," greeted Naoyuki upon opening the door for him. There no longer was the –kun that indicated his distance from him. Between two men, that suffix had been a wedge. But now, he just stared at him amiably. None of the bitter remembrance remained. He even looked boring. So that was the answer. They had become as ordinary, comfortable buddies.

Shino was close behind. "Tomoya. It had been some time. Come in."

His father had grown a bit fatter and there was color to his cheeks. His grandmother did not change much, there were only more of the white strands of hair among the gray. Both still retained a measure of strength and can move about rather easily.

Mother and son appeared to have led a comfortable, uneventful existence out here in the country. He grew envious of them.

The silence of country life here must have seeped into them. As they sat down to tea, there was hardly any conversation, only sipping and contentedly looking out the window. It all lulled Tomoya, a refreshing break from the cares and memories and dangoes and stuff. At that moment he thought he could stay here with them and never come back. He would not even mention why he came here in the first place. That was among those things he now wanted to escape from. They would understand. They would think he just got tired of the world and they would let him rest here just like Naoyuki.

He did not even remember that the flower field was just around the corner.

He had also forgotten it was Shino who talked all that messy business to him long ago. Or that she would bother to bring it up again.

"So Ushio is with you?" asked Shino.

"Oh?" He was actually surprised. Why did she have to remind him? He was a bit rueful and it kept him from speaking at the moment. But she knew anyway. She did not have Dr. Ichinose's intellect, and she did not need it. It was a fairly simple equation. Tomoya had a wonderful life with the child of his love, and out of the blue he returned to this remote place without her. It could only mean the girl was gone.

"Who sent you here?" she asked rhetorically.

"Sanae-san," was the expected answer.

"_Tomoya," _she had wept. _"Beg Shino if you have to. Bring aka-chan back to me." _

"And something happened to your child?'

He gestured 'no.'

"So she's lost. Well, we haven't seen her here, to be sure. But it was a good idea for you to be here. If you couldn't find her in your town, she just might come here. You only have to wait."

That was just agonizing. First, she sends him back to cursed earth with her talking about Ushio, and now she tells him to wait for her. Is this some sort of a cosmic joke? Wasn't he supposed to go looking for her?

"Tomoya," said Naoyuki, "searching will do no good this time. Ushio has a mind of her own. She is not anymore the little girl you brought here who wanted her father. "

"_Our little girl is our little girl, and she's not little anymore."_

"I could not stop you back then," he continued, sipping. "You lived as you would, slept as you would, came and went as you would, and I did not stand in your way. I could have done so, for you were but my son, but I could not bring myself to, for I knew I had a hand in it also. Now it is you who is looking for your daughter. That means she ran away. And why should she run away, if you did not push her to? So now, I suggest you do what I have done. All along, I have waited for you to come back to me. And you did." He took a last draught to empty his cup.

And he was speaking so casually, and "suggesting" such an unbearable thing! Is this how much provincial air they have breathed?

"Out here, Tomoya," seconded Shino, "we have the luxury of time. Even if the whole world around us has changed, somehow life here stays the same. Call it a miracle if you will. If so, then it is this miracle that enables us to weather long years, something you may not be able to do in the outside world. It was this that helped me to wait for your father. This is why I believe you should stay here and await your daughter's return, for a lifetime if need be."

Great, he thought. More pride to chew.

Actually, there was none left. Kotomi had just devoured everything.

"_How well had your father protected you?"_

Even in the deep of the silent countryside night, even laying on a mat next to his father's, she would not let him rest. He thought being with his father may take his mind off of home even some, but just now he recalled that she made a reference to him.

"_How well had your father protected you?"_

_What the twopenny fig do you care about my father? I have already solved your problem with yours._

"_How well did my parents protect me?"_

The sly fox had already stopped all his avenues of escape. He cannot berate her through her own family. Besides, he resolved not to be like her, cold and underhanded. What could be done for now is to defend his own father. But he could not do it. His father really did not lift a finger. He did not protect him.

Only waited for him.

_"There is no way you can protect her, Tomoya. Now more than ever. She is grown. The only thing you can do, is__ not __to protect her. Let. Her. Go."_

If he could not protect her anymore, well, then, he had no choice.

_I… Will… Wait._

* * *

><p>Akio was at a total loss at how to talk to Kotomi. Not so his wife. She was so deep in grief she would not talk to anyone.<p>

"So Tomoya is out of town. Where?" asked Kotomi.

"Someplace you don't know. I'm sorry." He did not want be involved any further.

_What place I don't know? Is there so much I also don't know about Tomoya's life while I was abroad? And why are you folks so worked up? I'll get the girl back and make her see what she's missing. And you, too. _"Akio, I know you will understand me. What I'm doing is for all of you."

"To be a genius like you? I'm sorry, but we're not a family of geniuses."

"Do you not want to redefine your family?"

He shrugged. "What for?" He sighed. "You are a good girl for caring about family. But it appears you don't know exactly how to care for _this _family."

She merely set her lips in a flat line. She didn't want to tick Tomoya's family off of her.

Akio decided to enlighten her. Perhaps it's about time she too, heard more of his family's past. She had been a close friend anyway.

"Let me tell you something about Nagisa."

_Nagisa again?_

"You were there when I showed up at Nagisa's play, right?"

"Pardon me, Akio-san," she bowed, "I do not wish to take any more of your time. I am grateful for your help."

The next logical place to search for Ushio was the Fujibayashis' address. She knew at least that Kyou had been her teacher in both preschool and grade school. She would naturally take to her for being her second parent for so long.

It took her some time for her ringing the doorbell to be answered. It was a hint. The delay alone told her that they were possibly taking their time to billet the girl in one of the rooms. She must be inside.

Or maybe not. When the twins came to the door, Kyou looked more than a bit serious, and Ryou's eyes looked tired already, at only six-thirty. It was also possible that Ryou was crying over the girl and her sister was still comforting her when she arrived. It looks like she'll have to hammer some sense into those two as well.

"What brought you here, Kotomi?" Kyou asked.

This was no time for friendly diversions. "If it is about Ushio," Kotomi said, "you need not worry about her."

_Is this some joke? _"Kotomi," spoke up Kyou, keeping her voice level, "the girl had just ran away from home and her father has nearly gone mad looking for her, and there's no need to worry?"

"It was all a misunderstanding. If I can talk to her, I can set her right."

Ryou looked at her sister. "Onee-chan…" She responded by taking her hand in reassurance. Kotomi tried to hide her annoyance._ What is this all about now? So, you two are accomplices in the crime. Well, then, prepare to see the light._

"I don't understand," said Kyou, still keeping her voice level. "What had Ushio done wrong?"

Now she could not keep her irritation in anymore. She strove as she let out at least a bit of it. "I will make you understand," she began, also keeping her voice level. "I am about to make her future brighter than any prospects this old town can offer. I will make her better off than any of you could possibly make her. You will all thank me when you see what marvels I have done for her. "_ That hard look. So be it. I will parry your every word, as I did to Tomoya. I'll also be ready to dodge any dictionaries or punches you throw at me. And don't even think of throwing any dramatics or hysterics. I can see through all that haze._

For her part, Kyou _was _ready to launch a tirade or a thesaurus, or even tears of rage. If she did, she would certainly have been beaten to pulp. But it happened that she heard three words that rang painfully in her ears. _"this old town"_

_This old town? Why, Kotomi, this is the town where—_

A flood of memories of their Hikarizaka days roared in.

They were memories of the gang. In it was a quiet girl who was frightened of bullies

_"Ijimeru?...Ijimeru?..."_

and made dreadful jokes and dreadful violin playing. In it was a girl who only stared blankly and spoke in a cute monotone.

"_Bonjoooooouuuuuurrrrrr?"_

A girl who barely made it in baseball, but cooked sumptuously. Who looked bland, but can smile if she chooses to.

Who cried and broke down in a fit. Through it all, the gang was with her.

"_You can do it," _she once told her, urging her to open the suitcase that was meant for her. _"Fight!"_

And Nagisa was there.

Returning her so-called jokes. Beating the castanets and touting her "improved" violin performance. Worrying about her.

Being her friend.

The flood cascaded all over her until she can no longer see the enemy through it. This time, she was holding Ryou's hand, tightly, to gain security from her.

"Now, Ryou, I understand," she wept. "Nagisa isn't the only one who's gone. She's also gone. It's all gone." She buried her face in her free hand. "Everything has fallen apart. Tomoya is gone. Tomoyo and Youhei are not here. Ushio is broken. And Kotomi, she is no more." When she let go, she shouted at the professor. _"Who are you?"_

That was a set of words she could not parry.

It didn't form a coherent statement that presented a conclusive train of thought. In philosophy, she knew, it was a notoriously open-ended question. It disoriented her terribly. It left her open to Kyou's reproach. If she tried to delve into that question, when she had not the time nor the inclination nor the unruffled mind to reflect, she would likely end up with

"I'm K-Kotomi," she managed in a trembling voice. "I-Ichinose Kotomi. Y-You spell Ichinose w-with three k-kanji , and Kotomi with t-three h-hiragana."

"If you are Ichinose Kotomi," she said through the tears, "know this. Okazaki Tomoya can never love another woman. Okazaki Ushio will never accept another mother."

She broke away and returned into the house, leaving Ryou burying her own face in her hands. When she returned she brought a sheet of canvas and unfurled it before Kotomi. On that sheet was a mother holding a little daughter in her arms. With the double-ahoge, the identity of the woman was confirmed.

"If you want to see who made this," choked Kyou, motioning into the house, "She's inside."

This was too embarrassing for Kotomi. This was not going according to plan. She managed to recover some of the strategist in her, and it told her _this_ was not the time to talk to the girl. Not with those two around. Who knows what else they could say to sway the girl right in front of her? She herself was moved already.

She beat a retreat to her car with a loud bang to the door and drove away. When she had gone out of sight, Kyou fell on her knees and held on to her sister so they could finish off what was left of their tears.

Meanwhile, in a room with the lights off, Ushio saw the car speed away. _Is she coming back?_

Kotomi was quick to plan her next move. It has to be tonight, or tomorrow night. At least, she now had a comprehensive tactic to throw everybody off. There was this one name always mentioned and always standing in her way. Most importantly, she discovered it stood between her and Ushio.

She must do away with Nagisa.

* * *

><p>The wee hours of the morning was Nagisa Furukawa Hour to a lone fan called Ushio Okazaki. She likes to think of herself that way. After all, she said to herself that she loved her, she loved her, she loved her. She did nearly everything a faithful fan would do; she drew her pictures, she held moments of silence for her, she eats her food (anpan) at school, she quoted her words, if bitterly, and she sang her song even as a child. The dango song, though it had long been off the charts. She even loved dangoes as well. Perhaps she should have adapted her antennae, too?<p>

But she was an underground fan. She was careful not to hurt her dear father, who she knew (from Sanae that fateful afternoon) had nearly killed himself and abandoned her for a full five years but for the mention of that name. Yes, after they first met, he regained his vigor, and they loved every minute they shared, but after she was hospitalized, there was a terrible scar on him. He became more melancholy and became terribly strict. He would not let her play outside and even thought, aloud, that he might not let her attend high school. "If she was to be as weak as her mother, and repeat years, also." If not for her grandparents, that may well be the case.

Though in other things he tried to live on with her normally as before, she could still see that scar. On his left hand. Wearing that little silver ring told her he was still hurting for her mother. And she hurt him even deeper by daring to leave him after lying that she loved him!

At this hour, her grandparents are asleep. The Fujibayashis are asleep. Her father, somewhere out there, is also asleep. Not even the most ardent midnight marathon freaks, she gathered, would catch her out here this far along into nighttime. This hour was hers and her mothers' alone.

This time, our fangirl is trying her latest event, a re-enactment of her mother's play. She even decided to do so under that same streetlamp. Problem is, she had a costume and all, and had done the same opening hand gestures _ad nauseum _for about an hour now, but there was one line she could not remember. And it was the opening line!

She tried to dredge her memories. Sanae must have said something about that.

_Wait…Why am I returning to this place?_

* * *

><p>At my age, I still cannot take everything in, understand all of it, but I can remember the very words as they were spoken.<p>

I could not see her through my clouded vision, but her broken voice still rang clear as a bell.

"_Ushio, you did not kill her! She lives in you! When you were born she…"_

_No, that's not it! Why that? Of all things!_

_Wait, I think I got something. It was something she said before that. Her voice was still calm._

"…when your mama entered high school and stood on stage for her play…"

_OK, that's it. The play… The play…_

"…Akio told her not to cry. He told her we have not given up our dreams. We gave all our dreams to her. Her dreams became our dreams. So when we gave up our dreams, Akio and I, we were happy, because she was safe. She was our dream now."

"So she didn't die, right?"

"Yes, aka-chan, she didn't."

"Then why is she dead now?"

To my surprise, her eyes widened, as if terrified. Of me.

…

"…_She lives in you! When you were born, she gave her all to you. All! Her dreams…My dreams and Akio's dreams that we gave to her…Her dreams that became our dreams…her love…her heart…She had given you her heart and her dreams, our dreams, when you were born. But she did not leave a bit for herself. Even her last threads of strength…her last breaths…her LIFE…all was given…to you…to you…just so you could be born…  
><em>

_Her dream was a family. It was her wish."_

…

Wish…

That's it.

…

For the last time, she opened her palms.

"Shall I take you away?"

She put her hands on her heart.

"To the place…

"...where wishes come true?"

"I will take you there," said a voice behind her.

She felt like somebody stabbed her from behind. Her eyes actually widened and her mouth actually gaped. Fearfully, hesitantly, she turned to see who it was… _It can't be… She just drove away. She can't possibly return until tomorrow, right? I stayed in my room all night long after she was gone just to make sure she will not come back._

A smiling face greeted her.

"You look just like your mother on that stage," Kotomi said.

_Is she making fun of me? Kyou said she planned to use me so Papa would marry her. _But the voice was sincere.

"Ushio, I love your father very much."

She did not start out denying what Kyou said. And the voice. She really was showing what's inside her with that voice.

"Ushio, I love you, also. I want your wishes to come true. I want your father's wishes to come true, also."

"How could possibly know what our wishes are?"

She replied, also opening her palm in one hand, putting the other over her heart, and it must be said, she pretty well captured the play, "Do you not wish to make your life better? For yourself and your family?"

"What could make our life better?"

The hand over Kotomi's heart clenched but a bit. She was faced with yet another open-ended question. But she's not backing down this time. "You know all too well."

"No, I don't know. Can you tell me?"

The outstretched hand fell.

"Do I have to spell it out for you?" she said with but a trace of anger. Ushio almost felt irked but that voice was unmistakably sincere. She herself might as well be, if she truly loved her father. And if he loved her father, she couldn't perhaps harm her for real, right? But still…

"Even now you still do not know what I can do for you and Tomoya?"

"Papa and I do not happen to measure people for what they can do for us, but for what we have done for them."

_And Tomoya had done a lot, _Kotomi recalled in a flash. He just found her in the library one day, and the next thing she knew, he made her a part of his life. She became important to him.

_To hell with that._

"Do you not wish to go someplace else? To be what you can't be, to do what you can't do?"

Ushio's hands suddenly clenched into fists.

"Where would I want to be?" she whispered menacingly. "What would I want to be? What else can I do…" She flared up. _"…but stay with the people I love?"_

"Do you not realize, Ushio?" she thundered back in a voice hoarser than she'd want to admit. "All of this is for Tomoya! If you want to stay with those who you love, _I want to also!"_

"You said you love my father. Well then, you must know that I love him far more dearly and _truly _than you could ever claim!"

This one sentence broke all her straws all at once. She grabbed Ushio's arm and proceeded to drag her to her car.

"Well, then, I'll show you just how much I love Tomoya," she concluded in a hard voice. "After I brought you to the States, you will see what you have almost thrown away. You will be grateful to me."

She broke away in one powerful pull of her arm. "I want to stay here!"

"With all of those memories? This town holds nothing for you but pain!"

"Just so you know," she sobbed, remembering everyone, Sanae and Akki, Kyou and Ryou, Akemi and Chii, Tomoya…and Nagisa, "My memories of this town were far warmer than they have ever been cold!"

It was not entirely true. The scars of her father extended to her as well. But she wanted to let what she had just said to stand. She wanted it that way, now. Kotomi forced her to. The lady was right in a sense. There was too much pain in this city. And she realized that she had only added to it by running away from her father. She was hurting him again. But now she wanted to right everything, not by running farther away, to America, but just by changing things here, on the spot.

Now it was time for Kotomi to play her trump card.

"Oh? So your memories were warm. Memories of whom? Nagisa? Memories of someone you never even saw? You actually find warm the memories of someone who you never proved yourself existed!"

_But she is! She exists! Why would Sanae and Akki-san be baking today if she did not exist? Why would I be here, alive, if she did not exist? Who gave me my heart, and the life I now use to listen to your preposterousness?_

"Nagisa is gone! Nagisa is no more! Do not let yourself be held down just because of her!"

"Mama is dead, yes. But she is not gone," she said bitterly. "Mama is not gone, she is here. She is here. She is here! _Watashi wa…Nagisa desu!"_

I am Nagisa.

She pointed a finger at Kotomi. "My mother gave all she had to me. My mother gave me _all she is! _How could you even speak of her like this! Have not my mother given a part of herself to you as well?"

She beat the castanets…she hailed her deadly music…she helped fix her garden…she worried about her…

She loved her dearly.

"Have not your own parents given themselves to you as well?"

"What does this have to do with my parents?" Kotomi found herself blurting. In an instant she remembered she invoked her parents when confronting Tomoya. _Only I can do that! Why?...How?..._

"If you speak another word about my mother…if you even follow after me from now on…I will damn you! Forever!"

Ushio broke into a weeping run, like Sanae, but she had a definite destination. It was back to her father's apartment. She could not bear causing any more sorrow to him. She could not bear being anywhere near the shadow of the woman who maligned the memory of her mother. She just wanted to cry...in her father's arms.

In the meantime Kotomi sat down on a bench, still figuring out just exactly what happened to her operation, though it was plain to her. She just couldn't bring herself to admit the results of her little experiment. So unscientific of her.

Her shadow started to form against the dawning morn.

Why is the sun even rising?


	7. The Return of the Queen

Rays of morning light beckoned the sleeping Furukawa Bread to once more open its doors to the city and to the new day. The gloom of dull cloth draped over the trays was dispelled by the bright glow of dawn. In a moment the entire place was revealed by the brightness and defined by the sharp lines of emerging shadows.

Akio broke into a gaping yawn as he entered the area. There might still be time for a little swinging practice at the bat outside. Opening the bakery was kind of a fun time of the day for him…

Yet a pall set over it all knowing he may well be alone in minding the bakery today. Sanae's just devastated. Man, looks like there will be no baseball today.

_Nah,_ he thought after clearing the bakery. "Thirty minutes won't hurt" was his happy maxim as he slung his bat and marched to the door

Chime! _Oh man, a customer already?_

Hey, she looks like…

"Our house is locked," she said plaintively.

"Ushio!" he blurted as he dropped his bat in amazement and grabbed her by the shoulders. This is just unbelievable! "Hey, maybe you're some clone of hers. Well, tell your double, wherever she is, that everybody here's…" He had to swallow a lump in his throat. "...just dying to see her back."

Ushio couldn't help but smile at his antics after a hard night. She gave him her warmest and kissed him in the cheek for about half a minute. He was stunned. _Goodness! So early in the morning!_

When she finished, she regarded him with a teasing stare, enjoying the look on his face. "Well, Akki-san, clones do not kiss now, do they?"

"Sanae!" he called out, rushing back into the house. The excitement in his voice filled the place. "Look who's here! Haha! Be prepared for the shock of your life! The UFO's coming to get you. Get dressed up, will you? You don't look ready for intergalactic travel, you know. Fix that morning breath! Our guest is waiting."

A little later, "Who is that, anyway?" she can hear Sanae say as they walked down the hallway. "UFO! UFO I tell you." "Stop kidding me, Akio, you know I'm not in the mood."

When Sanae saw who it was… Oh my goolye! _It's U.F.O. alright!_

"Akio," she breathed, "tell me. Tell me I'm in outer space."

"Yes. You are."

"Tell me I'm just dreaming, Akio. It couldn't be morning yet."

"Phew! What does day or night matter in space?"

_Miss UFO from wonder planet, death-ray me in my sleep._

"Aka-chan…" she whispered. "Aka-chan…Aka-chan…_Aka-chan!"_

She couldn't get enough of Ushio. If Sanae was a python, the girl would be dead in a second. The tightness of her embrace made the girl cough, which startled her.

"Oh, Ushio dear, I'm so sorry. It's just that…" Her eyes started to glisten, but before the waterworks could have its way, Ushio put a finger on Sanae's lips to hush her. "Sanae-san, we're not in the bathroom. I can't cry here, right? You said that."

With a smile, she understood. Dramatics would be reserved for that other place where Ushio can cry, once she gets there.

"Alright, Ushio," she said in a playful voice, "have it your way."

With one mighty effort, she lifted Ushio as with a bride, sending Akio into a state of utter disbelief. He never knew she could be this strong when she wants to! But the adrenaline didn't last. Ushio's weight caused her to stagger backwards, and at last she fell sitting on a chair, and the girl landing on her lap. She pressed her face against Ushio's cheek in a sniff-kiss, as with a pillow. As if she was a dango plushie.

_Dango…Dango…Dango…Dango…_

_The dango family._

_There's a naughty brown-grilled dango_

_And a nice sweet bean dango…_

_If you put the dangoes all-together_

_It's a full-house hundred._

_The baby dango just loves to snuggle_

_wrapped up in all that happiness…_

* * *

><p>Akio still ended up running the bakery by himself. Sanae wanted to spend the whole day with Ushio on her lap. <em>So much for relief…<em>

"Akio-san!" shouted Chii through the doorway. She was all fired up. Close on her heels were Sora and Akemi. "The authorities reported a UFO sighting at your house!"

"Is it true, Akio-san?" cried Akemi. "Is she here?"

"Eh…" He pointed a thumb at the back. "Don't disturb Sanae. She will bite if you try to take her cub away."

"Ushio!" hollered Chii. "We're here! Welcome back! Ushio! We missed you!"

"Ushio!" joined in Akemi. "We miss you! Please come out! Have you been eating well? Ushio! Answer us!"

The sound of running footsteps were sweet as music to their ears. Their faces glowed with such delight they could light an entire stadium by themselves. As soon as their beloved Ushio appeared at the doorway

_Blag!_

"Ushio!" exclaimed Sora as he rushed to the stumbled girl. "Are you alright?" he asked in concern as he helped her up. "I'm fine… just a sprained leg, I think." "Don't move so fast! I'll prop you up." Just then, they noticed everybody staring at them…

"Perhaps you would want some tea?" said Akio with crossed arms to the boy.

"N-No sir!" he stammered. Both were red-faced. "I have taken my snacks, actually."

"Then you better get home and eat some more. I say, you look like you just got heatstroke."

"Akki," Ushio blurted, "you want to let the man walk home in this weather? That's just cruel."

"Oh, well then, if you care about him so much, then _you_ escort him home. Tit for tat his bringing you here before. After all, it will make a great date."

…

"AAARGH! What did I just tell them?"

"What a lovey-dovey couple," broke in Sanae.

Akio was thunderstruck.

"You look so good together, I can tell you'll have a future. Just finish your studies and land a good job first before anything serious, OK?"

"No!" the two cried in unison. "There's no such thing in my mind yet!" Blush.

Akio rushed to her girl classmates and clapped them together by the shoulders. "You're talking about them, Sanae? Haha, these girls are just so cute they have a past and present to match Ahahaha!"

"_Ecchi!" _shouted Chii with a punch that sent Akio into the air. _"I want a man!"_

After Akio landed, she came to. "Oh?—Ahhh! What have I done? Akio-san, wake up! I'm sorry!"

Akemi, for her part, was about to burst into joyous tears but Ushio stopped her. "Please, we all have enough of that. Let's sit down to tea. Sanae-san will be more than happy to have us all here."

"Hai! And I will show you my latest combination, noodle bread dipped in special rainbow jam!"

"Try it!" invited Ushio. "You'll love it!"

"Ushio," Akio managed to sputter, "I thought you don't want any more crying in this house. Why Sanae's bread?" Then, as he realized what he just said, he abruptly got up to see

"So my bread…" sobbing, "…my bread…makes everybody cry!" she finished as she ran out with leaking pipes.

"Sanae!" he called as he followed her. "I said your bread moves to tears of joy!"

"Akio!" followed Chii. "I'm sorry! Come back!"

That left in the bakery Akemi…and the two. "Well, come on, you two!" Akemi said as she pushed them further into the house. "Set the table will you?"

* * *

><p>"I'm afraid they do not have any telephone there," said Sanae, as everybody continued their tea. "They are quite contented in their isolation."<p>

"But certainly you remember the way back there," said Akio.

"Not entirely," replied Ushio. "It's been quite some time."

"Bleh," said Akio. "We got a problem there. Neither Sanae nor I could remember the way there either. Looks like our hands are tied."

"If I only knew you were just somewhere around here all this time, Ushio," seconded Sanae, "I wouldn't have told your father to go there."

"No, I didn't exactly say I forgot how to get there. But…I'm not so sure of the turns I should take anymore. Though I can still recall certain places if I see them."

"It's important we have the _names_ of at least a few spots here and there," said Akemi. "Then we could buy a map. However, I get dizzy just looking at that stuff, blargh. All those lines…"

"Ushio," asked Sora, "Do you know any names? Can you tell at least which prefecture we should target?"

"Hmmm. The train stop was Shi…yes…that's it. Shirasagi 00-5."

"Shirasagi? Wait I think there are a handful of stops with that name. Numbers are also misleading. We must take a closer look."

The four Hikarizaka students finished the tea in a serious discussion where each ventured what he or she knew, remembered, or heard of places they had been to. The Furukawa couple also pitched in to offer what they could recall. At length, the discourse ended at nightfall when everybody had finally agreed on a route.

"There is a midnight express if you want to leave soon," informed Akio, "though Sanae or I can't accompany you as we have to watch out for those burglaries over the night. Can't afford to lose any money with the bills coming. And you two girls might be sought out by your parents at this hour."

Which leaves…

"AAARGH! Don't tell me…" Akio flustered, caught in his own calculations. "Bah, just leave in the morning."

"Akio," said Sanae, "if Ushio wanted to see her father so badly, why should you delay them? I'm sure they will arrive there by morning. And do you not trust the boy? I mean, he's eighteen already."

_Eighteen? Didn't know this puny guy was, considering he is still in high school._

"My grandfather was often sick back in the day, so I quit a year to help him."

"You have no parents, son?"

He gestured a lonely 'no'.

"Grampa is all I have in life. I am worried how upset he could be if he hears I'm going on this trip."

_Sora, _thought Ushio, _you don't have to push yourself. I will be fine. I'll just go tomorrow with Sanae or Akki-san._

"I will call him tonight so he won't worry," he finally resolved. "I will tell him I am a man now and I can take care of myself."

"What is your family name, by the way?"

"Kobayashi. It's a common one."

"Kobayashi? Ah! Hahaha! The blacksmith, huh?"

"You know him, Furukawa-san?" he said excitedly.

"Heheh. I once helped him make those wakizashis back in the day. Some of Yukine's boys have them, in fact. Fear not, boy, I have you covered! Call your old man and I will talk to him after you do."

* * *

><p>Later, Sanae finished packing their travel bags. It was almost nine in the evening and they were waiting for a taxi to pick them up and convey them to the station.<p>

"You will take care of my baby now, you promise?" said a teary-eyed Sanae.

"You can count on me, Sanae-san," he said proudly, thumping his chest.

_Sora, don't be so worked up! We're not even sure if the route's airtight._

Soon, they saw the cab turn around the bend. Ushio was still unsure of this trip. "Sora…I…"

"Come on!" he cried in excitement as he pulled her by the arm to the arriving taxi.

She was just a tad breathless as she felt him tug at her. _He is so thrilled. He's like a child going on a vacation. Sora…_

_What's in this particular trip for him?_

* * *

><p><em>That day, when we started it all, I was just showing off.<em>

_I tried standing tall on my toes, though we were both but too young._

_The wind we both felt on our knees, it made us laugh out loud._

_Oh yes, when I remember that, they're really the best of times!_

In the train, Sora took out a blanket and draped it over a sleepy Ushio. Their bags lay side by side over them at the rack.

"Oh…" she mumbled groggily. "What is this?"

"You might catch a cold. You know how it is at this hour."

Soon the clanking and swaying rhythm of the train lulled the girl to sleep. Not so Sora. He was up all night minding their things, eating, and trying to enjoy whatever view he could still make out through the night.

Later, when most other passengers had slept, he was still wide awake, and this time he felt it safe to gaze at a different view.

_I had just heard you walk away from me since then,_

_And yet no matter where I go I will know your voice, do you see?_

Her hair's just…fabulous.

He ventured a timid hand into the girl's brownish locks. Oh, gracious, they just…slide by. I never knew she had hair this great.

Her face looks friendly even asleep. That's saying a lot. In the deep of the night, she shows herself. And I find she's as kind and warm as a home to return to.

I never saw a face this kind.

_I'll never be on my own, the shadows here are two._

_I will listen for that song, wherever it is, yearning and hugs, far or high!_

He tried even more timidly to reach out to her hands, and truth to tell, very nearly got there. But he stopped short and instead held on to her arm just above the wrist. No, he did count himself worthy of touching that far, he wanted to share more of himself first.

Holding hands is a powerful gesture. It signifies how strongly a couple gives of themselves to each other.

_All I feel in here, I will turn them into a whisper for you._

_Come what may or not, I want to stay right with you, holding your hands._

Suddenly one of Ushio's hands took hold of his. He immediately felt a power surge of elation and he tried to hold down a smile that threatened to tear his face apart. Only to hear her say,

"Papa," in her sleep.

The drain came as fast as the rush. But he was not one to be held down by disappointment. He let her hand stay in his, if only for now. "Papa is here, Ushio," he whispered.

A while later, papa fell asleep.

_And we will go on and on…_

_Making all of our moments._

When he woke up, Ushio woke up at roughly the same time, as a consequence, seeing where their hands are, they abruptly found themselves red as beets and withdrawing from each other like an earthworm that touched salt.

"You…" stammered Sora, "were already cold."

"Oh…t-thank you…it's so nice…" She dared say, though, "But why my hand?"

"Well, we have no mittens."

"Mittens? At this time of the year?"

"But it's the coldest time of the night…"

Neither attempted to reply for five minutes.

_Just then…you asked, "Are we there yet?", if I wanted to rest._

_I laughed, saying that I was fine. I am always feeling my best._

_So we went on side by side in our little stroll._

_But lo, right in front, up ahead, the road we took looked so dull._

They had some trouble finding their way all right. Stock knowledge and memory had to be supplemented with asking total strangers. But it was a fun exercise for them.

_Yet_ _no matter where we go, there is none to stop us._

_We will never be afraid, together we move ever more onward!_

_These are what my heart says, take them into the air._

_I close my eyes yet I find, though I see you not, all along you're right there! _

In that little trip they discovered they can take the trouble together and still have a break, chatting, laughing, snacking. They were in no particular hurry, anyway, no precise time to catch Ushio's father in. The more they took their time, they found out, the sooner they were to seeing Tomoya.

_What I have within, I can't hold back, it shows right there in our tracks,_

_In this time and space, paths we have traced will be there, plain to see._

_All I feel in here, I will turn them into a whisper for you._

_Come what may or not, I'll be there, holding your hands, all the way._

_So we will agree to make…_

_A tomorrow we will share._

* * *

><p>By now, Tomoya was ready to give in. This place did not lose its refreshing effect on him, though it seemed he had been staying here for years. Today he was talking a hike before dawn into the woods. Nothing could be heard here, only a very occasional bird or cricket. The loudest noises were those of leaves rustling in the breeze. The breeze itself was his friend. It soothed all the fatigue out of him, until he was comfortable enough again to walk, and so he didn't feel tired at all at anytime in that stroll.<p>

Thanks to Shino, though, a choice still dangled before him. He could choose to wait for Ushio and go back to live with her again. He could also completely forget her and all of his past. It was a messed-up life, anyway. In it he had fought bitterly with his father. In it he was just a dirty boy in school, who ended up in a dirty workingman's job. In it the one who cared enough to pick him up, junk and all, suffered such cruelty it drove him back to the dogs. In it the one candle flame of hope that was left for him who he pledged to cover with his hand against the wind, flickered out before his very eyes. In it the flame somehow returned, but only to have him singed with the burden of trying to keep a word he could not even fulfill. Every step of the way, it seemed, shouted to him only one thing: he was total trash.

But out here, the wind never reproached, never burdened, never reminded of pain. Only soothed. It was a wind that blew no wisps of love, love that only hurt him.

He purposely took an unknown path where he thought Shino would never find him. He has already grown afraid of her, afraid she would again say that name, though when they sat quietly together on the tatami she would only mention of the weather and how the rice grows. But even her silence was a foreboding. It told him that they were _waiting. _Waiting for _what? _The answer, _that_ was what he was really frightened of.

He encountered a brook he had only seen for the first time. Come to think of it, in that city, he forgot what a running mountain brook looked like. But now it looked so inviting. The morning sun showered sparkles upon the water, and it laughed teasingly, enticingly, like sweet flute music. He found himself wading into the water…Brrr…so fresh. So cool. So ticklish! Ah, this is more like it!

He splashed on himself handfuls and handfuls of this wonderful substance. He lay and let one of the rapids slap him on his face. It felt so good! When he emerged, he laughed so heartily and deliriously, feeling the freedom of the woods course in his blood.

Wait. There was one thing left. He was not entirely free while an iron band clung to him. The last vestige of slavery.

He wore it on his left hand.

Now, he strove mightily to get the thing off of him. He meant to throw it downstream where it will never be found again, buried under the stones. But it stayed with him for so long, it already clung too tightly to his finger. _No! I must take this away! I have had enough of this!_

_Tomoya..._

_What?_

But there was nothing to hear but the sloshing of the rapids.

_You have gone too far, Tomoya._

"Who goes there!" he shouted in fear. But there was no one. And it was true. Only he had ventured this far into the woods. The voice came from inside. His conscience was talking to him. His own heart was rebuking him. And then he recalled from whom he got his heart…

_Tomoya, how could you let this happen? Don't you remember? What will Nagisa say, if only she knew? Just because she couldn't hear you anymore..._

Again, he envisioned in his own mind what he saw in that country train. In it all was white, and the cherry petals drifted in from everywhere. In it he again held his little girl by the hand. He imagined his wife again standing before him, smiling just for seeing him, but there was that hurt look in her eyes.

"Tomoya-kun, now I know how far you regret having known me."

He looked down and couldn't stand lifting his eyes. His left hand felt hot from shame holding the little girl.

"Tomoya-kun, you perhaps also regret having Ushio-chan?"

"I could not protect her, Nagisa," was all he could say.

Slowly, the hurt in her eyes was replaced with deep pity.

"I could not stop her from dying," he sobbed. "I said she was someone only I can protect, but in the end I was calling for you. I was a shameful nothing!

"Nagisa…

"All these years I tried to prevent her from suffering our lot. I didn't want her to attend the school we attended. I didn't want her to catch your condition. I stopped her from going beyond my sight.I kept her with me. I didn't let her out. I watched over her. I didn't want her to love anyone. I thought this was a chance to redeem my word. But now someone has come to take her away from me.

"I am useless. Now I depend on someone else to keep her future safe. And I must marry her, though I do not love her. You were the only one, you were the only one, whom I loved…

For a while, she did not speak as she let him empty himself. When he was somewhat cleared, she said,

"I never told you to protect her, have I?"

"Nagisa! You are agreeing with Kotomi? How?"

"Kotomi-chan is a good friend. She will never try to take you while Ushio is around.

"She knows that you don't love her, and she accepts that. She wants to win over Ushio, because she is the closest to you. She cares about the one you care for the most.

"By that she herself acknowledges that she is powerless, and everything she hopes for depend on Ushio.

"It's time you let our child decide for herself. If she chooses Kotomi, you can't possibly deny her happiness, can you, Tomoya-kun?"

"Nagisa…"

"Our child is strong. She surges like the tides of the ocean. I am the shore. I am fixed here. But our child sweeps the rocks, breaks them. You do not need to protect her.

"All I ask is you stand by her, Tomoya-kun. Hold her hands. Do not leave her. Tomoya… Do not ever regret…having her.

All around him, pounding his back with its might, the waters of the brook flowed powerfully. It does not want protection. Even in his reverie he could feel its force and hear it rumbling.

"Tomoya, if you had another route you may have loved another. Kyou, she still loves you even now. Tomoyo, she would have been the best for you, if we never met. Kotomi, she was the first in your life.

"But know this, Tomoya, I…I could never love any man, but you alone.

"Tomoya. Ushio is my arms, holding you close. Ushio is my hands, wanting to feel you. Ushio is my breath, saying nothing but your name. Ushio is my feet, rushing to be with you. Ushio is my eyes, seeing only you. Ushio is my ears…listening only for your voice…

"Tomoya," she continued, her voice breaking, "do not push her away. Do not push away…my love for you. My love…only for you…

"Tomoya…

_Tomoya…_

* * *

><p>Nagisa Furukawa is dead. But she is here. Before she breathed her last she gave her heart to those she loved. Her memories speak powerfully to this day.<p>

This was the real reason Ushio Okazaki returned to him. So Nagisa can love him, beyond the grave.

* * *

><p>Tomoya slung his wet shirt on his arm as he tried to retrace his steps home, but he already went so far he was not sure. It did not matter. He didn't care letting anyone see him without a shirt on.<p>

Up ahead light broke through the forest. He let his own feet lead him to

A vast meadow of… flowers.

He let his feet wander into the middle of the field. The same orange-yellow glow enveloped everything, this time from the sunrise. That other time when it glowed like this, it was almost sunset.

"Ushio… You were alone, right?"

"Umm," she agreed.

"Did enjoy going on a trip with me today?"

"Umm."

"Would you mind if you stay with me?

"I haven't been a good father to you all along. But I will make up for everything."

_Yes, Ushio, I will make up. I must have strangled you all this time._

"So, perhaps you would want to live with me, after all?"

"Uh-huh."

"You mean it?"

"I want to be with you."

…

"I'm sorry.

"I'm sorry.

"I'm so sorry."

"Ushio," he sobbed, remembering, "Can you still forgive papa…for frowning on the memory of your mother? Ushio… Please, come for me."

A wind blew.

"What?"

Or was it the flowers? Something's moving the flowers.

Someone's running through the flowers!

He braced for the impact. He knew it was coming. He knew _she _was coming to get him!

3…2…1…

"_Papa!"_

_!_

Father and child cried together. Wept together. Shouted together. Tried to out-hug each other. But it was just to let out the shock they absorbed from the impact of the reunion. It's OK, she's in daddy's arms, anyway.

After a while, they had both calmed down, only a bit, but they wouldn't let go of what they wanted to say.

"How did you get here, Ushio? Who brought you?"

"Papa…" she said half-nervously, half-excitedly, blushing. "Is it OK?"

And she pointed to a lone figure by the trees.

Well, Tomoya, this must be horribly embarrassing. Having a stranger witness the cheesiest moments you have with your daughter. Oh, well…

But he was actually smiling. "He brought you here…again?"

* * *

><p>Traffic along the Tokaido is very often heavy-smooth. It kept moving, but it was certainly no comfort to Dr. Ichinose Kotomi who was hurrying to get back to Keno before nightfall.<p>

The afternoon wore on as she tried to fight off the boredom with her Bach playing in the car. It became such a habit she couldn't bring herself to shut it off even though it brought back memories of her childhood violin days.

To balance it, she tried to distract herself with the sights along the expressway. She noted the new car brands plying the road, what the billboards said, notable seascapes, or some old out-of-place buildings. If she drove fast enough, she could even get a glimpse of Fujiyama by sundown. She was a sightseer and it helped her cope with the grind of constant commute.

She came to a nondescript stretch of the expressway where traffic was light. She was now driving between the sea and a bank of forest, but the sights were just monotonous now and the cars so far apart and silent she couldn't help but focus on the Bach.

It must have been her violin that drew Tomoya to their house in the first place.

He was such a nice boy…and they had the best of times in that garden far behind her. Her mother stood there making such tasty meals for them, and her father watched them with warm amusement as his little girl enjoyed herself with her new friend. The four of them were a family.

_Tomoya, we could have made a wonderful life together. What I saw in Ushio's eyes, I knew they came from you. You and Ushio shared the same eyes._

_I knew you were hurting. You just can't hide anything from me. Even your laughs, they have that trace of sadness in them. That's just how much I feel for you._

_I knew I had to do something so we could be happy together in America. Me, you, Ushio…_

_My family is no more. Yours is broken. Why can't we just fix it, together?_

But as far as she saw it, it was too late now. The people of that old town will have nothing more of her. Not after making noise there. It was back to the States, where more heated words awaited her.

Her head started to ache terribly. She only noticed now that she choked at her breath and there was a pain in her chest. _This is not good…_

She pulled over and took out some tablets. The pain did not go away. Her breath still raced. The last of her pills had already spilled into her hands. She downed them all. _There, that should do it._

It did not subside. It will not, not while the root of it all remained. But there was no treatment for that now.

Her mouth hung open, and her eyes grew wide as she felt it grip at her.

She screamed. In between were labored, painful whimpers, but then the screaming returned.

Her head came to rest on the wheel. The car blared continuously right there by the expressway and rang into the afternoon air.


	8. Finding Kotomi

Sanae had Ushio all to herself for a good part of the day with their reunion. Now, it was Tomoya's turn.

That day everybody tacitly agreed not to get in the way of the two. It was to be a day all theirs, though it was spent only at home. There were no visitors, no phone calls, and even if Furukawa Bread had burned down, perhaps, nobody would have informed Tomoya.

They just sat there on her bed, Nagisa's pictures sitting there on his lap, while Ushio lay in Tomoya's arms, savoring his presence and blissfully whispering "Papa" every now and then while he just kept stroking her long, beautiful hair.

Later in the day, they had a cookfest. They intended to throw a third party to celebrate Ushio's return. Father and daughter even played some with the preparations, wiping icing and stuff in each other's faces. One of the desserts made had to do with balls of steamed rice flour, served in skewers, and dipped in sweet mitarashi sauce, which are called…

They sang that song together as they made the finishing touches to their banquet.

* * *

><p>Kyou was quite busy overseeing the art class. She wanted to make sure nobody would go vandalizing their seats or their seatmates and stuff. She also kept an eye out the window for Botan. Lunchtime drew near and she didn't want anybody getting near him and mistaking him for some escaped exotica from an organic restaurant.<p>

"OK, everybody, wrap that up! We will continue this tomorrow so make sure you bring your things, and I don't want petty excuses like you forgot or the dog ate your watercolors or what."

When she returned to glance at the window, she saw Ryou hurrying through the grounds, pausing only to pat her pet boar on the back before rushing again. She got a large newspaper.

"Keno Professor Breaks Down Along Shin Tomei" stood out in bold down the middle of an inside page. For a full half-hour, Kyou just sat down staring in disbelief.

"Onee-chan, we must tell this to the others."

She didn't want to reply just then. Her head seemed to spin and she wanted to vomit.

At length, she finally managed to respond. "I'll ask leave of the principal. Let's go."

* * *

><p>"Doctor Ichinose Kotomi, 35, a resident lecturer and faculty of Keno University in Tokyo, was found in a state of nervous breakdown along New Tomei Expressway in the direction of Shizuoka. Tow truckers of the expressway found her car blaring for almost an hour around 3:54 PM and causing much distress to passing commuters. Police have already taken some personal details but as of yesterday the said Doctor Ichinose was taken in for medical care and could not talk…<p>

"Colleagues point to ongoing conflict in a suspended research in the Unites States in which she had been directly involved. Sources point out that the project went haywire some months back and there was a nasty exchange of words over the matter…"

"They didn't even mention where she was confined!" finished Akio in dismay.

The twins just stood there mournfully and they did not want any more details. Sanae set a hand over her forehead. "The poor girl! And all this while she had also been looking for Ushio."

"I don't know about this…" mused Akio, "perhaps she already realized…"

"Akio!" she said in disbelief. "You don't say…she really meant it?"

All three gave her sad, knowing stares. After a while, Kyou spoke up with clenched fist. "That's what she got for her so-called professionalism! Damn, sometimes I wished she never went abroad at all!" she said pounding her fist on the table.

"Onee-chan," said Ryou, "probably we also have something to do with it. I think…I think we should have just let her in at sat down to talk with her."

"It's no use. She figured out it was all for the best. She has that access to opportunity. But, hell, Kotomi, why? Why?"

Door chime. Tomoya and Ushio brought their first batch of goodies with them. "Konnichiwa, everyone. I thought maybe we could eat this here—"

What's with everybody?

Ushio couldn't bear to open her eyes for a while after reading the article. "Ushio," said Tomoya, "you know you ran away not because I was packing your things, don't you?"

"Papa. I said something to her. About mother. About her parents."

After they have heard it all, everybody was torn and appalled.

Yes, she did slight Nagisa and the family for one, but she was also family. They felt for her as a household would for a wayward daughter.

"Ushio," Tomoya finally spoke up, "All of us are affected here, but it has the most to do with you. From the beginning of this issue, everything revolved on your choice. I think we should let you have the final word on this.

"If you don't want to see her, we won't blame you. But perhaps…" He broke off. He was one to understand Kotomi like the rest as they had been through nearly everything since then. And she did stand by Nagisa, also, especially that day when she went on stage. But Ushio only just met her. All the weight was on her pan, so it would be nigh unthinkable to invoke old times.

_Mama, I so wish you were here right now. What am I to do?_

A breath-holding silence befell them as they awaited her decision.

Finally, she broke the impasse.

"Papa I…I felt about it deeply. I might have said 'thought' about it, and I would _think _it right that she is suffering now. But we all know that it is not merely strategies or steps or acts that came into play. I cannot downplay that voice. I cannot forget how she tried to take me into the car saying that she loved you. All along, it was also a matter of heart.

"Papa, I know you can't love her so well like you did Mama, but if we want her to respect what's in our hearts, we must at least recognize hers.

"Papa, if you still care deeply about Kotomi-san, why shouldn't I? She was kind to me. I might say it was all but a plan, but her heart was also there, so I cannot conclude that she is cold-blooded.

"Papa, she vilified Mama, but now I see that when she did it, she was also hurting her own parents. She has hurt not only herself, she hurt her family, and us her family as well. _I _would know, for we both know how it was to have hurt each other, papa."

_Yes, Ushio. I would also know that. You can see. You are strong._

_Ushio,_ her heart said, _everybody in this city are a family. Kotomi grew up in this city. She loved someone in this city, and she helped two students from a school in this city. Her old town wants her back. You, Ushio, must make her see that. _

"Papa, let's go to Tokyo right away!"

* * *

><p>The feast turned into a picnic. Soon everybody was busy packing food into lunch boxes, baskets, food keepers, everything they could carry. They shuttled between the apartment and the bakery carrying stuff, and it was three times the fun of cooking the food in the first place. Now, maybe we could use more hands…<p>

"Count me in!" cried Chii. "I wanna see Tokyo again!"

"Chii," rebuked Akemi, "we're going to see Doctor Ichinose, not Tokyo. This is not a vacation."

"Hehehe," she snickered rubbing a finger under the nose, "I knew it all along, don't be such a spoiler."

Ushio just laughed all of it off. "Don't worry, Chii, you _will _see Tokyo for free as a reward for visiting Kotomi-san. I will even request the school to excuse us three for the trip."

"Make that four!" Chii said pointing behind her.

She turned and saw, oh man, so _you_ are here, too?

"Maybe I can help, Ushio," Sora said warmly.

"Uh, yes…W-Why not," she fumbled, blushing. The two girls just exchanged knowing glances. "O-OK. Four then! I'll write a letter on the fly."

Akemi giggled. "No need, Ushio! Hikarizaka's having a field day tomorrow for Dr. Ichinose! The board, the faculty, the students, everybody's making the trip. This is in support for her research in the States, and in remembrance of her putting two of our students abroad."

"You're not saying?" Ushio said in happy disbelief. She broke out in squeeing as she hugged Sora, who suddenly went red again. To dilute the effect, the girls joined in and they made a group hug.

Later that night she checked the e-mail address Kotomi gave her and she found out that bill notices have been redirected there to ease stress out of the patient than if she was billed face-to face. It came from a certain private clinic just outside Tokyo called Tea Leaf. _So she didn't suffer herself to be put in a big hospital. That's how shameful she feels right now. I really should see her._

"Papa, we should let the school procession move on to Keno so they can show their support there," she said to Tomoya. "We couldn't let so many people bother her in that small clinic. I have the address. Our party will go there directly."

* * *

><p>Early in the morning, everybody (two Furukawas, two Okazakis, two Hikarizaka girls, two Fujibayashis, and one Kobayashi) got into two taxis with all the food and stuff under the trunk. They were to be taken to the bus station and take a trip they have booked in advance over Ushio's PC.<p>

Everybody took pictures of themselves and of sights along the way. They ate some of the lighter snacks they brought. Chii for one was more than a tad agitated over everything. She would often take so much pictures with Ushio's cam that she would have her charge it in the bus about at least four times in the entire trip.

Later, while everybody else were napping and as they neared their destination, Chii noticed Ushio carefully wrapping up a somewhat large box.

"Say, Ushio, what's that?"

"My bomb," she said nonchalantly.

Not very far behind a convoy of all sorts of vehicles, chartered buses, cars, vans, and even Hikarizaka's mobile clinic filed through a route following the Tokaido in solemn fashion, bearing banners and pictures in support of Doctor Ichinose. They were such a sight that a local newspaper from Nagoya ventured out to capture the scene.

When the convoy came in view of Mount Fuji they waved flaglets while a contracted photographer took their picture from afar with the sublime landmark at the background.

The convoy poured into the Tokyo metropolitan area by about noon. They did not lose time to proceed to Keno where they planned to stage a program as close as can be allowed to the main campus.

* * *

><p>The other group, however, proceeded directly to Tea Leaf.<p>

The clinic was but a low two-storey building that did not even indicate its name with a sign. The number and the street, however, could not be mistaken. The neighborhood was amply shaded and beautifully-trimmed hedges rimmed the streets. At Tea Leaf itself, a dolphin topiary graced the driveway. Yup, this was the place, alright, as described by the district policeman.

"However," he warned, "I don't guarantee you will be entertained there. It is a place patronized for its privacy. Why, a few years back a syndicate leader was traced there, and it took us two months to find him out from the first lead."

Ushio did not like the comparison. _Kotomi-san, you won't have to hide like that anymore. We will take you home._

They booked a room in a small rented house nearby. They can't afford to stay any longer than a day, so they had to plot their moves really fast.

Chii, the intrepid, volunteered to march to the clinic and openly ask for Doctor Ichinose. Outside, Ushio entrusted her wrapped "bomb" to her and instructed her to give it to the doctor as soon as they meet.

Once she got there, though, peering through the glass door and seeing only a burly Secret-Service-like coat-and-tie guy for a receptionist, she had other ideas.

Slinging the box on her back, she crept under the hedges and managed to find a backdoor to the pantry.

When she got in, she could not resist the temptation, and sheindulged in picking through boxed jars of strawberry preserves and some crackers. She even managed to pocket some before she went out.

She ventured quickly and stealthily through the hallway. Wow, there don't seem to be anybody patrolling around. She then started to ring doorbells galore, distracting patients or their assistants while she watched behind a bend. Nope, no Doctor Ichinose there.

"You're looking for someone?" boomed a voice from behind.

"Yeah! How could you possibly know?"

Yikes! It's burly guy.

She found herself carried bodily down to the lobby, where he compared the CCTV clips of the hedge, the pantry, and everywhere else she intruded into, to the interloper. Uh-huh, no mistaking the hair antennae.

"I only want to see Doctor Ichinose!" she whined.

"Ey," he rumbled, "what are you, some college dropout? Maybe you want to pass in her subject?"

"Yeah! In fact, I'm very flattered you called me a college girl. You know, I always dreamed of being in college. Maybe you're jealous of me. Doesn't look like you ever got out of high school."

He prepared to throw her out the door, and he was angling already when she said, "All Hikarizaka's coming to get her! They got a rally in Tokyo and they're asking the government to hand her over before it's too late. Turn the TV on!"

Just then, her worried companions, wondering why it took her so long for a simple inquiry and deciding to come in full force, had arrived.

"See them? They're the advance sortie! Doctor Ichinose's got a major debt and we're coming to get her!"

_Oh, Chii, you dimwit, _thought a facepalming Akemi, _"and now you just have to embarrass all of us? How will we ever get there now?_

"That's right," seconded Sora, "Doctor Ichinose has a large unpaid debt to us and we'll get the police if she doesn't show up soon."

Burly man actually gaped in disbelief.

"Yes," Akio broke in. "You must get her or we will storm in. We have here three men and two martial-arts girls with us."

Thinking the situation untenable and perhaps surmising that it was the real reason the doctor had a breakdown, he dropped Chii and phoned the management.

A representative came down. He then argued with them that the doctor could not be disturbed upon her own orders, but when Tomoya made a second threat of police action he phoned the doctor herself. Upon seeing that they were talking over the receiver Ushio shouted.

"Kotomi-san, we're here! Please come down!"

Everybody followed suit. The representative and burly guy were red with embarrassment, knowing the noise would filter through to their client. Indeed, there was a silence at the other end of the line before it went dead.

"Look at what you have done!" cried the rep. "I think we should be the ones calling the police now!"

But he was stopped by rushing footsteps. Dr. Ichinose herself stood before them all.

Ushio spoke up. "Kotomi-san, you have a very big debt to us. You did not attend our first party for you. You did not finish your physics class with me. You broke our hearts without any apologies. And now," she finished in a quivering voice, "you left your family and your town without even telling us. Kotomi-san! Pay us! Pay us!"

Kyou was next. "If you do not come with us, I will bully you to no end! Remember that! I will beat the sense back into you until you come home with us."

And Akio, "If you don't budge, I'll make you eat the rainbow bread!"

Lastly, Tomoya came forward. "Kotomi…"

This was a big hitter for her.

"Kotomi…if you refuse us, forget that we ever met. Forget that we ever played in the garden when we were little. Forget about that suitcase. I will make sure I will ruin that garden of yours as soon as we get back!"

"Then punish me as you like," she said. "I will not return with you. Not while I have disgraced my dear friend Nagisa and my own hometown."

"Chii," said Ushio, "the box."

The two employees were aghast as Chii tossed her the box. She immediately tore the wrappers away and took something out. A teddy bear. Kotomi's old teddy bear.

Kotomi put a hand over her gaping mouth as the girl approached her with the bear. At that moment she thought she saw someone coming at her, with two hair antennae waving in the soft breeze.

Once again they were students in Hikarizaka, that day in the clubroom, long, long ago.

"Kotomi-chan," said Nagisa, stroking her hair, "you have such beautiful hair. I envy you." And then, "Oh, there's a split end. Shall I remove it for you?"

"It will not…hurt?" she asked timidly.

"No," smiled Nagisa. She gently, nigh painlessly twirls a strand of her hair and pulls it off her scalp. "See? Did it hurt?"

She signified a 'no', then said, "Only a bit. But, I wish you would not hurt me anymore."

"Kotomi-chan. You know the Big Dango Family? Do you know why I like them so much?"

"No…that's pretty old, you know."

"Kotomi," whimpered Nagisa, "don't say that."

"Oh, sorry. I hurt you too, now, haven't I?"

"You know, the Big Dango Family, they always stay together. Kotomi-chan, will we always be together?"

"But, Nagisa, I…said you did not exist."

"And I said I will damn you forever."

"Nagisa-chan, how can we be together if we're like this?"

Nagisa made her warmest smile. "It does not matter. We're one big dango family. I like the Big Dango Family because, even if they hurt each other, even if they quarrel, they make up in the end."

She gave her a big friendly hug.

When she came to, she found Ushio in her arms and the teddy bear was between them. That was it for her. She couldn't help but hold her tight, and cry. In front of the staff. In front the Furukawas, the Hikarizaka students, the Fujibayashis…and Tomoya.

"Nagisa. I knew it. You would always overlook my quirks, no matter what I did."

"Kotomi-san," said Ushio, "do you know who else wants you back?"

Chii, on cue, excuses herself to the staff and grabs the remote to a large wall TV. It took her time, looking for the news, but she did find it. A huge crowd from Hikarizaka had gathered outside Keno, voicing support for her.

"Is…this…true?"

The girl giggled her sweetest. "We can turn off the TV if you like."

"No," she breathed as she stared rapt into the screen. She did recognize faces there. Dr. Koumura was right behind the board member interviewed.

She then glanced at her teddy bear. She had neglected it for so long. "Father…mother…" And she embraced her stuffed toy.

"Kotomi-san," Ushio told her, "I'm sure your parents would have been very, very proud of you."


	9. Epilogue

Kotomi's face grew hard as she fingered through her Wacbook PC and saw that a smear campaign, from both anonymous and known sources, was already building up in the US academe. "She Can't Take The Heat" was what one slogan read. Others were openly questioning her sanity and thus her right to participate in any academic or scientific endeavor, as well as urging her to quit any enterprise she already joined or sponsored. She even found a handful of critics from Keno.

Kyou held onto her friend's hand. "Kotomi, if they don't want you anymore, you can just stay with us for good. Teach at Hikarizaka."

The rest of the girls joined in a group hug. "Kotomi, we're here for you," said Ryou.

"Don't mind them, Kotomi-san, they don't know what they're losing," said Ushio.

_Easy for you to say, _Kotomi thought, sighing. They never got wind of the long years and effort she invested in her professional life. _Then again they got a different set of life experiences._

Now that Kotomi was found the group decided to go next to Keno. Kotomi put all of the Hikarizaka students in the car with her while everybody else went on ahead in two taxis.

* * *

><p>The crowd outside Keno had turned the place into a school festival of sorts. Students drew more banners for Doctor Ichinose and distributed tokens and souvenirs, even small food items, to passers-by and a performance of the Choir Club was set up. The crowd was really enjoying the publicity they got from Tokyo journalists and a few foreign media.<p>

Later a hush rose from the crowd as three cars in a row were spotted arriving at the university parkway.

In a short while everybody was rushing toward the road and they enveloped the three cars in no time.

"Doctor Ichinose!"

"Long live!"

Chii put two hands over her hanging mouth. _So this is what it feels like to be famous! I never got this sort treatment from my own school in my whole life!_

However they could not get out now as the crowd threatened to squeeze them flat. It was like being surrounded by house-size storm waves.

Just then, they felt someone stand on the roof and heard a shout from a loud megaphone. That voice…

"Sunohara!" Kotomi exclaimed delightfully.

"Everybody turn back or we'll have you responsible if anything happens to Doctor Ichinose!"

Tomoyo grabbed the thing from her fiancé. "Please, calm down! We won't get anywhere with this!"

When the clamor had died down somewhat, the board and the principal pressed their way to the car and opened the door for Kotomi. They escorted her while Ushio and company trailed them, both providing her cover. They reached the stage they set up for the Choir Club.

Upon settling herself on stage, Kotomi looked out upon a vast sea of faces all looking at her.

The chairman of the board stood up and started to speak on the doctor's behalf, but he did not go far before Kotomi herself stood up and took the microphone from him.

"Everybody," she announced, teary-eyed, but in a calm, clear voice. "Welcome to Keno! Welcome everybody! I love you!"

And the crowd could not have enough of cheering for her.

* * *

><p>That evening the whole gang, past and present, sat down in a hotel room as one big family.<p>

Youhei and Tomoyo got a good part of the time to themselves. They were asked about their date, and why was it that they arrived so soon.

"We saw everything on the cable," said Sunohara, "and Tomoyo and I figured we can't let ourselves miss out on the fun if it involved one of our buddies."

"So Ushio," Tomoyo said ruffling the girl's hair, "you're already graduating this year?"

"Uh-huh. I'll be so glad if all of you here, including you and Uncle Youhei, would be there with me."

Tomoyo chuckled patronizingly. "Why should we ever forget?"

"Of course, girl!" said Sunohara. "We will be there, and we will have the grandest time! We will make it the best thing Hikarizaka has ever witnessed. That, and a toilet seat!"

And for _that, _he got Tomoyo's knee in his belly, again.

"You will excuse Youhei now, will you?" apologized Tomoyo. "He got so much free time he forgot he was human."

"Hehe," he managed to choke. When he could speak again, he said, "Boracay's just awesome, man."

"You didn't see Pacquiao there?" asked Tomoya.

"Nah. I hear he's in the States now to train. His last big fight, they say, before he retires."

Speaking of States, just then, Kotomi's phone rang. It was a direct call from a colleague in Berkeley. She was just a bit nervous as she answered. "Hello, Loskowitz? Dr. Ichinose."

"Good evening, there, Kotomi," a voice rang over the phone's loudspeaker as everybody in the room listened breathlessly. "I have seen what they're doing to you online."

"Yeah," she sighed, "I knew this would happen. Perhaps now I have a better perspective of who my friends and foes are."

"Ichinose. All is not lost. Blenheim and I have started a signature campaign to keep you in our research here. I have also contacted all of your known connections in the US and in Sweden, and I found that there are more than a few people who still believe in you. Just hang on there, will you?"

"This," she gasped, "is just unbelievable. I never thought—"

"Kotomi, don't underestimate yourself. We here were impressed with the support you got from your people there in Japan. Your breakdown may destroy a lesser person's career, but there are many who won't forget the contributions you made over the years. The Department of Energy has just expressed support for you this afternoon."

"I…I…" She was on the verge of tears.

"Still, your detractors are in a big camp of their own. We'll be facing a huge battle here, I can assure you that."

She wiped away her nascent tears. "I don't care," she returned in her typical calm, level voice. "I have seen this already, it's the same. Though the scale is bigger now, I won't mind expending a little more effort than usual."

"Excellent. I will call you later. Maybe I'll have Johnston talk to you, so hold on." And the line was hung.

Ushio leaped at Kotomi squealing with delight in tight embrace. "Kotomi-san, I knew you would make it!"

Everybody was almost crying tears of joy. Even Sunohara had to turn his back on them.

"Kotomi," said Tomoya , holding her hand, "We will never leave you. If the stress builds up, just voice call us, we will always have Ushio to receive you."

She was blushing from the gesture. Even after he knew her intentions, just being touched by him fired her up so.

Then again, speaking of intentions, there was one little matter she wanted to break before everybody.

"Kyou," she began, "I just can't stay behind. I have already done too much in America for me to leave it all just like that. I could not help but return and try to pick up the pieces of what remains. But this does not mean I have forgotten my hometown. Today I have been reminded just how much I owe my countrymen."

"Kotomi..." Kyou whispered.

"Perhaps," she said looking at her directly, "staying here, you can do more for Tomoya than I ever could."

Kyou's expression visibly stiffened and for a while Kotomi thought she saw her blushing.

"Tomoya," she said, musing on how she must say it, "I…know that Ushio is precious to you all. But I want you to know that I still want to bring her to America.

"If any university there will not accept my recommendation, I will always have colleagues who will support Ushio on my behalf.

"I still believe this will do wonders for her. Having received these blessings, I still don't think it right that I should not share it with the people I love.

"Though now, Ushio, I am not forcing you, or even urging you, to come with me. I'm just asking you. Please. You guys have given me all of the companionship a forlorn child like me could ever dream of. You may be contented in your state, and you may not desire the things that I have. Yet, I could hardly think of anything else to give of my own. Please, think of it as something shared by a friend.

"Ushio. You told me that you and Tomoya measure people by what you have done for them. So now, I will do this for you, just to show how much…" Her voice started to break. "…how much you mean to me." And she embraced the girl. "Nagisa…thank you…thank you…for being there for us."

"Kotomi," Tomoya said, also in a breaking voice, also hugging, "you were always too kind."

The joyful waterworks were such that toughie Tomoyo, shaking herself off of all this, said, "Well! I just heard something about Nagisa being being with us. While we were in Manila, Youhei and I chanced upon a cultural performance and we got a piece here for you." She took out a card on which were inscribed lyrics. "It is a ballad about the River Pasig," she continued, "This river was a classic in Manila. Back in the day, it was fresh and clear, the pride and joy of the city.

"Sadly, today it is very much befouled. I would have loved to see it return to its pristine condition.

"The last lines fit Nagisa very well. If you don't mind, I'll read the translation for you."

"_The Muse of the River Pasig_

"_I was once a fair maiden_

_In love's wondrous realm._

_Once the love had perished_

_So had the kingdom vanished._

"_My life and strength have passed on_

_Unto the breasts, the hearts of every one._

_If you shall have me living_

_My love you will be giving._

"_If you shall have me living_

_My love you will be giving."_

They all smiled and bowed their heads in silent remembrance. Her life, and everybody else's, surely did not stop with her grave. There was no need to mourn and cling to her so tightly now, for she was with them all along.

Kotomi and Ushio looked at each other significantly, smiling like little children. It was the way of little children to look forward to every new adventure life brought. To Ushio, going abroad was a new horizon. To Kotomi, living with Ushio abroad was a brand new beginning as well.

* * *

><p>Shortly after she graduated, Ushio and her father went on an excursion to a certain beach which her mother also visited with him back when she was pregnant with her.<p>

It was a very windy day and the clouds lumbered along visibly across the gold-tinted sky. The girl took into herself the fresh sea breeze and tasted the salt sprays on her lips.

"Ushio, did you know your mother broke at least one promise in her life?"

She looked at him, but not to await any answer, for she figured she already knew. "Maybe she said you both would come here again?"

He smiled."No, that's not it."

Still, it was close. So the logical next step was, "It would have been awesome to sit here, us three, you know, papa?"

He smiled warmly at her daughter as he watched her wade into the water. The waves were strong that afternoon and their crests lapped at the fringes of her skirt.

He waded into the water with her. "Don't venture too far, dear."

Far ahead, the horizon was inviting. It was but a flat line, but it held its own secrets just beyond that line. Ushio peered excitedly away to where it merged with where the glow was the brightest. That was where the sea met the sky.

"You know, papa, you can still feel the beach under you even here. The shore never leaves you." A gust blew at her and she had to clear the hair out of her head. "But out there, where there is no more beach, the tides continue. Encircling the world. Papa, someday I can also take you there."

"Yes, I know," he said, holding her hand. "I will be waiting for you."

"I will bring home to you all the treasures I could carry. I will make our family proud. And I will find a man. And I know," she finished, looking across the vast expanse of the heavens, "you will also be proud of him."

**The End.**


End file.
